The Gift of submission - 7/6/09

[2009/07/06 12:12] Pirate Russell: Ok, those that will, please turn off any radars, MystiTools, etc.
[2009/07/06 12:13] Pirate Russell: Please take all cross talk to IM, and all collar, etc commands to the secondary channels!
[2009/07/06 12:13] Pirate Russell: Welcome to House of V's College of Kink! As most of y'all know, My name is Pirate Russell, Head Mistress of the College, and today's instructor. I have been in SL for 3 1/2 years, a lesbian Domme, the entire time.
[2009/07/06 12:13] Pirate Russell: For any that need to leave early, all transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/07/06 12:13] Pirate Russell: What Is Submission?
[2009/07/06 12:14] Pirate Russell: Author: Raven Shadowborne © 1997
[2009/07/06 12:14] Pirate Russell: Submission: (by definition) the act of granting power to another
[2009/07/06 12:14] Pirate Russell: A rather frightening prospect for most people. To give control of yourself to someone else. The act of submitting is part of the power exchange inherent within a D/s relationship.
[2009/07/06 12:14] Pirate Russell: It is the giving of yourself to another within preset limits, arranged before hand.
[2009/07/06 12:14] Pirate Russell: It is an informed choice and therefor consensual. A person shouldn't just decide to submit to the first dominant they meet.
[2009/07/06 12:15] Pirate Russell: A submissive should take the time to get to know the dominant outside the roles of dominant and submissive, as the person he/she is.
[2009/07/06 12:15] Pirate Russell STOMPS Her foot! Underlines, and says that again!
[2009/07/06 12:15] Pirate Russell: A submissive should take the time to get to know the dominant outside the roles of dominant and submissive, as the person he/she is.
[2009/07/06 12:15] Pirate Russell: With the information gathered during that initial learning of each other process, the submissive can then make an informed decision of whether or not to submit to that dominant.
[2009/07/06 12:16] Pirate Russell: This process should include discussions of expectations, wants, needs and desires.
[2009/07/06 12:16] Pirate Russell: Each submissive must decide for themselves how far they are willing to go and still stay within the guidelines of safe sane and consensual, thereby not crossing into the realm of abuse.
[2009/07/06 12:16] Pirate Russell: Plus Limits, hard and soft.
[2009/07/06 12:16] Pirate Russell: The three tenets of D/s must always apply for the submission to be true submission and not abuse.
[2009/07/06 12:16] Pirate Russell: Why a person is submissive varies extensively from person to person. Some are submissive just for a little extra zing in their intimate lives. Others may have a deep psychological need that prevents them from being any other way.
[2009/07/06 12:17] Pirate Russell: There are three main types of submissives There are more concise groupings than these three broad ones, as evidenced by the 9 levels of submission that are widely used and referred to in many books and discussions of D/s.
[2009/07/06 12:17] Pirate Russell: ~A: Sexual Submissive (AKA bottom, sensual submissive)
[2009/07/06 12:17] Pirate Russell: A sexual sub is in D/s for their own sexual gratification. Once their sexual needs are met they are satisfied. They feel no real need to submit any personal control to another.
[2009/07/06 12:18] Pirate Russell: ~B: Psychological Submissive
[2009/07/06 12:18] Pirate Russell: This broad category tends to include those who are in it for the pain and humiliation a D/s relationship can give them.
[2009/07/06 12:18] Pirate Russell: This category tends to include most masochists. Those who have suffered real abuse and are stuck in victim mode, tend to end up in this category.
[2009/07/06 12:19] Pirate Russell: ~C: Natural Submissive (AKA True Submissive)
[2009/07/06 12:19] Pirate Russell: she/he is born with a submissive nature. A need to please others. This need and submissive tendency goes beyond sexual gratification.
[2009/07/06 12:19] Pirate Russell: It is in their nature to please others, and they will readily give up their control to another with very little or no urging from their dominant.
[2009/07/06 12:20] Pirate Russell: Who's to say which category is best?
[2009/07/06 12:20] Pirate Russell: Being submissive is unique and you are an individual. Being submissive comes from the heart. It can not be believably faked, acted or role played.
[2009/07/06 12:20] Pirate Russell: True submission is a gift of high value. It is my opinion that those in the lifestyle should not judge any one else within the lifestyle for their choices.
[2009/07/06 12:20] Pirate Russell: Who are we to say that a sexual sub is not submissive on a different level? Or that there can only be one type of submissive? Remember, life is full of small variances and innuendoes, so is D/s.
[2009/07/06 12:20] Pirate Russell: I'm going to finish up with the submissive Bill of Rights. Remember that submissives are not doormats they are people, strong enough to give themselves to another person, let someone else tell them, make them, watch them do what they're told!
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: submissive Bill of Rights:
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to be treated with courtesy.
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to be treated with respect.
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to express feelings, whether good or bad.
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to disagree and express disagreement.
[2009/07/06 12:21] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to stand up for your beliefs, values and morals.
[2009/07/06 12:22] Pirate Russell: ~you have a right to retain your self respect and self worth.
[2009/07/06 12:22] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to say No.
[2009/07/06 12:22] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to walk away from an unhealthy situation.
[2009/07/06 12:22] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to be treated as an intelligent, thinking person, entitled to your feelings.
[2009/07/06 12:22] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to make mistakes and ask those mistakes to be forgiven.
[2009/07/06 12:23] Pirate Russell: All transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/07/06 12:23] Pirate Russell: Also, one that's not in there.....
[2009/07/06 12:23] Pirate Russell: ~you have the right to say, "yes, this one is a submissive, but not Your submissive"
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: College of Kink classes Monday, Tuesday & Friday @ Noon (12:00pm).
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: Y/you could always check the Search/Events and look for College or Join House of V Friends, or House of V groups, for notices immediately before the classes.
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: Questions, Comments???
[2009/07/06 12:24] ***PH***: nope just greetings
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: [ you have reached the end of the current notecard - resetting to first line... ]
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: SpeakEasy HUD detaching...
[2009/07/06 12:24] Pirate Russell: Hello ***PH***!
[2009/07/06 12:25] ***PH***: hello Pirate and others
[2009/07/06 12:25] ***JR***: hello ***PH***
[2009/07/06 12:26] Pirate Russell: Well, with no discussion or questions this is gonna be a SHORT class!
[2009/07/06 12:26] Pirate Russell: and ***PH***, no spankin for girl today, she's LATE!
[2009/07/06 12:26] ***PH***: cant discuss i was late :(
[2009/07/06 12:26] ***PH***: shit
[2009/07/06 12:27] ***OE***: Q....
[2009/07/06 12:27] ***JR***: well I think the last one You added is an important one as some Dominants start with get down on Your knee girls even when they don't know You
[2009/07/06 12:27] Pirate Russell: yes, ***OE***?
[2009/07/06 12:27] ***OE***: I understand the classes being of the submissive side
[2009/07/06 12:27] ***ES*** agrees.
[2009/07/06 12:27] ***OE***: What about giving a Domiant view and side?
[2009/07/06 12:28] Pirate Russell: That's next week, "The Responsibilities of Dominance"
[2009/07/06 12:28] ***TO***: Well I can offer some insight I had about submission. I actually tried the other side of the fence and tried to be submissive, I couldn't do it. I could go through the motions, but I could not get any joy from it. Made me realize that submissive do something that I never could.
[2009/07/06 12:28] ***OE***: Wonderful
[2009/07/06 12:29] Pirate Russell smiles at ***OE***, "Please do, ***TO***"
[2009/07/06 12:29] ***PH***: u can be sub when you trust and respect your dom
[2009/07/06 12:29] ***PH***: expecially when u are a strong dom
[2009/07/06 12:29] ***PH***: i switch
[2009/07/06 12:29] ***ES*** smiles and listens to Sir
[2009/07/06 12:30] ***OE***: How many switch, due, to loss of a Domiant?
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***PH***: you have to understand that some of us are strongly bipolar
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***OE***: As in death
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***PH***: none
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***OE***: lag lol.
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***PH***: chat lag
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***PH***: mhm :)
[2009/07/06 12:31] Pirate Russell: I don't know, I don't switch, and dont' really discuss that with those that do, ***OE***
[2009/07/06 12:31] ***PH***: so i have to find my balance in sl and rl
[2009/07/06 12:32] ***OE***: I found that no other Dominant could take the place of the One I lost real life..
[2009/07/06 12:32] ***PH***: so i can sub to a dom that i find he/she is able to actually sub another dom :) if you understand it .
[2009/07/06 12:33] Pirate Russell: First, ***OE***, My heart felt condolences....
[2009/07/06 12:33] Pirate Russell: Second, it doesn't even take death, jsut the break up of a relationship, I know someone that's leaving the lifestyle, because of a bad split with her Domme.
[2009/07/06 12:34] ***OE***: Many will sit back
[2009/07/06 12:34] ***OE***: I did
[2009/07/06 12:34] ***ES*** has known some who switch or change due to loss of relationship.
[2009/07/06 12:35] ***LB***: i think it's good to take breaks from the lifestyle when something like that happens it let's you reflect and see what you were meant to learn from that experience
[2009/07/06 12:35] ***MS***: Well, I am not all that familiar with Dom/sub relationships, having never been in one, but I really truly think everyone is like that in any relationship. If someone is taken away from us, for whatever reason, we try to find ways to cope, however that may be. In some, it could be leaving the lifestyle, others, to try other things.
[2009/07/06 12:35] Pirate Russell: I do know somone that was first girl, in RL and ended up running a fairly large House, because it was left to her, however.
[2009/07/06 12:36] Pirate Russell: Yes, ***MS***, I do agree,
[2009/07/06 12:36] ***OE***: Thats is being only submissive to one and Domiant to others
[2009/07/06 12:36] Pirate Russell: D/s is a relationship, and as such, it's as different as the people, and farm animals, that are in it.
[2009/07/06 12:37] Pirate Russell: IT goes back to that getting to know eachother... the negoiation stage, or maybe call it the 'courting stage'.
[2009/07/06 12:37] ***MS***: ***OE***, if that is what you are doing, there isn't anything wrong with it. If you aren't a cookie cutter sub, and don't feel like it/want to be, then don't. You do what you need to do to stay sane and happy.
[2009/07/06 12:37] Pirate Russell: hello again, Tonio, please take a seat
[2009/07/06 12:37] Tonio Roffo: I will when it shows
[2009/07/06 12:37] Tonio Roffo: :)
[2009/07/06 12:38] ***OE***: I do agree on the courting stage term
[2009/07/06 12:38] ***OE***: I have be Priate
[2009/07/06 12:38] Pirate Russell sees Her collars akin to wedding rings... I don't just toss them out cuz I want to have someone get nakey and bend over for My strapon!
[2009/07/06 12:39] ***OE***: I find my knowlege goes a long ways
[2009/07/06 12:39] Pirate Russell: And I ALWAYS value your input, ***OE***!
[2009/07/06 12:39] ***OE***: I don't seek the sexual
[2009/07/06 12:39] ***OE***: Thank you, Priate
[2009/07/06 12:42] Pirate Russell: Any other questions, comments or girls that wanna strip?
[2009/07/06 12:42] ***MS***: ***KB*** does!
[2009/07/06 12:42] ***CF***: Too late. I'm naked.
[2009/07/06 12:42] ***OE***: lol.
[2009/07/06 12:42] ***KB***: pfft
[2009/07/06 12:43] ***ES*** woofs to ***CF***
[2009/07/06 12:43] Pirate Russell: But then aint ya always, ***CF***?
[2009/07/06 12:43] ***CF***: mew, as the kids say.
[2009/07/06 12:43] ***CF***: Sure am!
[2009/07/06 12:44] Pirate Russell: I played "***CF***" for a week last week, and didn't dress at all!
[2009/07/06 12:45] Pirate Russell: Mean while, over here, on topic.... last call for questions, comments or dirty jokes!
[2009/07/06 12:45] ***ES*** loves ***CF***
[2009/07/06 12:45] Pirate Russell: Going once......
[2009/07/06 12:45] ***ES***: She is purr-fect.
[2009/07/06 12:45] Pirate Russell: .......................................twice.....
[2009/07/06 12:45] Pirate Russell: .............................................................................. Three times a ***LB***......
[2009/07/06 12:45] ***ES*** pounces Pirate
[2009/07/06 12:46] Pirate Russell: Class Dismissed!