How To Find A 'Good" Dominant - 6/30/09

[2009/06/30 12:08] Pirate Russell: Please take all cross talk to IM, and all collar, etc commands to the secondary channels!
[2009/06/30 12:08] Pirate Russell: Welcome to House of V's College of Kink! As most of y'all know, My name is Pirate Russell, Head Mistress of the College, and today's instructor. I have been in SL for 3 1/2 years, a lesbian Domme, the entire time.
[2009/06/30 12:08] Pirate Russell: For any that need to leave early, all transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: How does a new sub (male or female) ascertain the difference between a controlling and domineering person and a person who is a Dominant?
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: Are there tell-tale signs?
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: Is there a series of steps one can take to determine what type of person they are communicating with?
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: Is it trial and error or just a "gut" feeling?
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: And what about the "protective" Dominant who gains the confidences of new and inexperienced subs, only to want to eventually play with, or "train" them? Is this okay and are there telltale signs here, too?
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: These are excellent, thought-provoking questions of enormous importance to anyone searching for a partner.
[2009/06/30 12:10] Pirate Russell: Whether it's a life-partner or a play partner one seeks, even the most dedicated, masochistic or service-oriented submissive wants their needs to matter to their partner - for a play session or for a lifetime.
[2009/06/30 12:11] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/30 12:11] Pirate Russell: I think the biggest thing for new subs to remember is that it's even MORE important for a Dominant partner to
[2009/06/30 12:11] Pirate Russell: UNDERSTAND you and your needs and then to make decisions with that understanding in mind than it is in a vanilla partner.
[2009/06/30 12:11] Pirate Russell: Here's an example that just came up today with me and my husband. We are in the process of selling some property. Something came up in this transaction that increases our risk but also the potential pay-off.
[2009/06/30 12:12] Pirate Russell: This is 'stolen' from the Internet, so this is NOT My husband and I
[2009/06/30 12:12] Pirate Russell: I, conservative by nature, want to go with the sure but safe alternative; Master wants to take the risk.
[2009/06/30 12:12] Pirate Russell: Because in our relationship, Master has the power to make that decision no matter what I think or say, we had words about it.
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: One of the things Master said that I found reassuring was this:
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: "Don't you think that decisions like this weigh heavier on me precisely because I make them not only for myself, but for all of us?"
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: And that's what you look for in a Dominant.
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: Class Dismissed
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: JUST KIDDDING
[2009/06/30 12:13] ***MM***: *Giggles insanely*
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: Somebody who appreciates the weight of responsibility of what it means to make decisions FOR YOU as a submissive,
[2009/06/30 12:13] Pirate Russell: whether that be how many cane strokes you get or how long you stay in ropes, or what decision is made in a business transaction that will affect your financial wellbeing.
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: How do you know if S/He's got it?
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: S/he demonstrates it, over and over and over in things big and small.
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: YOUR NEEDS MATTER.
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: How you feel matters. What you think matters. Your wellbeing is as important to the Dominant as their own. It doesn't mean you as the sub run the relationship - far from it.
[2009/06/30 12:14] Pirate Russell: If I were running things, we'd for sure be taking the safer route in this transaction!
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: It just means that the Dominant never acts from his/her power base without considering the effect that action will have on their submissive.
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: I truly believe that my Master makes decisions will real thoughtfulness and consideration.
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: Even if his choice turns out not to have the better outcome, I know he made the decision thoughtfully.
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: I've already psychologically surrendered to his will in this matter. I trust Him. He's earned it.
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/30 12:15] Pirate Russell: How does a submissive discover this in a potential Master? TIME. It takes time. Lots of time. And in that time you spend together, you ask yourself these questions:
[2009/06/30 12:16] Pirate Russell: 1. Do I feel safe with this person? Safe physically, emotionally, spiritually?
[2009/06/30 12:16] Pirate Russell: 2. Do they do everything they say will they do? Do they follow through with promises? Are they dependable? Can you count on them?
[2009/06/30 12:16] Pirate Russell: 3. Are they interested in you? In your thoughts, emotions, fears, and desires? Can you be increasingly honest with them without fear of their anger or of their abandonment?
[2009/06/30 12:16] Pirate Russell: 4. Do they admit mistakes and take responsibility for them, try to fix them without blaming you for the problem or indulging in excessive self-recrimination?
[2009/06/30 12:17] Pirate Russell: 5. Can you laugh and be silly together or do you feel stiff and constrained in stereotypical roles?
[2009/06/30 12:17] Pirate Russell: 6. How a Dominant behaves during a Public Scene is no guarantee that s/he has the capacity to lead you in life - or even to the nearest exit of the public play space in the event of a fire!
[2009/06/30 12:17] Pirate Russell: If it's a good Scene, it means they know how to do a good Scene. No more, no less.
[2009/06/30 12:18] Pirate Russell: (This is a hard one for panting, starving newbies who are driven nearly mad with submissive frenzy to grasp - that not every hot-at-first-glance Dominant is a good Dominant.
[2009/06/30 12:18] Pirate Russell: I know something about submissive frenzies, having suffered a really bad case of it for nearly 3 years when I first came out. It makes you nearly blind with lust and need.)
[2009/06/30 12:18] ***KF*** looks around...
[2009/06/30 12:18] Pirate Russell: 7. Take your time.
[2009/06/30 12:19] Pirate Russell: 8. Beware the Dominant who wants to cut you off from your established ties and friendships.
[2009/06/30 12:19] Pirate Russell: 9. Take your time.
[2009/06/30 12:19] Pirate Russell: 10. If your Dominant makes you afraid sometimes, makes sure the fear is sex-tinged and more good than bad. You should never literally fear for your life, health, or sanity.
[2009/06/30 12:19] Pirate Russell: 11. Take your time.
[2009/06/30 12:20] Pirate Russell: 12. While it's wonderful to feel -truly feel - that you are another's property, you should always feel like VALUED property. You should never be made to feel truly worthless.
[2009/06/30 12:20] Pirate Russell: (Even intense humiliation scenes are not about really being worthless - they are about feeling humble, small, exposed, yes - but not truly worthless!)
[2009/06/30 12:21] Pirate Russell: 13. Take your time.
[2009/06/30 12:21] Pirate Russell: 14. Your Dominant should never make you feel that you have to "be careful" or he'll leave you or hurt.
[2009/06/30 12:21] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/30 12:21] Pirate Russell: These are some things that submissives, especially new submissives need to keep in mind, and use to select a competent and compassionate Dominant.
[2009/06/30 12:22] Pirate Russell: All transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/06/30 12:22] Pirate Russell: College of Kink classes Monday, Tuesday & Friday at 12:00pm (Noon) SLT
[2009/06/30 12:22] Pirate Russell: All classes are posted in Search/Events and look for College.
[2009/06/30 12:22] Pirate Russell: Questions? Comments??
[2009/06/30 12:22] ***JY***: Above all, a good Master/Mistress is always in control of Him/Herself.S/he does not rant or rave, and never punishes when angry.On the rare times that temper overwhelms Him/Her, S/he walks away until S/he regains balance.After all, how can a Dom/me control His/Her sub if S/he can't control Him/Herself?
[2009/06/30 12:23] ***VP*** nods
[2009/06/30 12:23] ***VP***: Too true
[2009/06/30 12:23] Pirate Russell: True, ***JY***! As for punishing, I correct, I don't punish
[2009/06/30 12:23] ***VP***: The first dictum for any Dominant is "KNow thyself."
[2009/06/30 12:24] ***VP***: And then,, be willing to admit you don't know all that much.
[2009/06/30 12:24] ***VP***: lol
[2009/06/30 12:24] ***VP***: Reevaluate...and correct your own behavious.
[2009/06/30 12:24] Pirate Russell: I think that's true for submissives, too, ***VP***, though that leads us WAY off topic
[2009/06/30 12:25] ***VP***: I think the one word that I would use to give any aspiring Dominant is "respect" and understand there is a soul in the submissive.
[2009/06/30 12:26] Pirate Russell: Yes, but Respect is earned, not demanded!
[2009/06/30 12:26] ***JY***: The best Master/Mistress knows S/he is human.S/he realizes S/he will make mistakes,and is quick to apologize when S/he doesS/he knows S/he won't be thought of as any less "Dommly" because of an apology. On the flip side, S/he realizes that others will make mistakes also, and even though S/he may punish for the mistake, S/he accepts an apology graciously and puts the event in the past.this is SO important
[2009/06/30 12:26] ***TR***: IN SL ppl tend to forget all that stuff yup
[2009/06/30 12:26] ***TR***: it's all a game to most here
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***VP***: Yes...unfortunately.
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: What I really don't like in SL
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: is ppl having to show
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: as much as they can
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: what they are about
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: while it should be
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: smth between a few ppl
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: or 2
[2009/06/30 12:27] ***TR***: :)
[2009/06/30 12:27] Pirate Russell: AND, ***JY***, factor in the SL slow/bug factor to increase frustration!
[2009/06/30 12:28] ***VP*** smiles
[2009/06/30 12:28] ***VP***: God, yes.
[2009/06/30 12:28] ***JY***: a good Dom/me is Compassionate. S/he cares about her sub(s), as well as their friends and family. S/he taks time to listen and respond to the needs of those S/he claims to care for. S/he isn't selfish, and doesn't have the illusion that the world revolves around Him or Her.
[2009/06/30 12:29] Pirate Russell: ***JY***, are you quoting My other Dominant clas?
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***JY***: No i am not
[2009/06/30 12:29] Pirate Russell: class
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***JY***: first class with you
[2009/06/30 12:29] Pirate Russell: he he, pretty close! LOL
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***JY***: I teach classes at another Place
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***PH***: is that a Dom or a partner ?
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***JY***: i have for about 15 years
[2009/06/30 12:29] ***TR***: <3
[2009/06/30 12:29] Pirate Russell: I have positively snapped at one of My girls, because I told her 33 seconds ago to take off her top. SL didn't cooperate, she did!
[2009/06/30 12:30] Pirate Russell: In a lot of cases, ***PH****, it's the same thing
[2009/06/30 12:30] ***PH***: nope agree to disagree on that one ?
[2009/06/30 12:30] Pirate Russell: Surely
[2009/06/30 12:31] ***PH***: sub/dom is not
[2009/06/30 12:31] ***PH***: partnership is about being equal in the definition :)
[2009/06/30 12:31] ***PH***: and bases on that
[2009/06/30 12:31] Pirate Russell disagrees
[2009/06/30 12:31] ***PH***: agree :)
[2009/06/30 12:31] Pirate Russell: There can be uneaual partnerships
[2009/06/30 12:31] Pirate Russell: er unequal
[2009/06/30 12:31] ***PH***: and they are sub/dom
[2009/06/30 12:31] Pirate Russell: Most Definately
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: as most of the partherships are in rl
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: not even by wanting
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: just are
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: in sub/dom that is defined and both or several partners are agreeing on playing a 'role'
[2009/06/30 12:32] Pirate Russell: But there are Majority and Minority partnerships all over the business world
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: yes
[2009/06/30 12:32] Pirate Russell: As much as My RL hubby and I try to be equal, it's not possible
[2009/06/30 12:32] ***PH***: and we all do :)
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***PH***: why not ?
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: you should strive to your balance
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***PH***: if you want to :)
[2009/06/30 12:33] Pirate Russell: Strive, yes, achieve, almost impossible
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***PH***: ALMOST :)
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: do you agree that
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***PH***: not on the same aspects but in all around
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: the balance of Dom/sub
[2009/06/30 12:33] Pirate Russell: But equal can't be the rule, if it's so close to impossible
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: in different aspects
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: or even different times in a relationship
[2009/06/30 12:33] ***TR***: can shift
[2009/06/30 12:34] Pirate Russell: That was My next point ***TR***, that it's all fluid, ever changing
[2009/06/30 12:34] ***TR***: can a guy that gets his a?* kicked in the kitchen by his wife coz he's a bad book
[2009/06/30 12:34] ***PH***: have too - for example he needs to wash dishes sometimes for me to let him dom me ^^
[2009/06/30 12:34] ***TR***: cook*
[2009/06/30 12:34] Pirate Russell: Personal relationships HAVE to do that.
[2009/06/30 12:34] ***TR***: not be ultimately dominant in bed 30 mins later
[2009/06/30 12:35] ***TR***: as always Pun puts it a little less eloquently than I did :p
[2009/06/30 12:35] ***JY***: If W/we are closed to change or to learning new things ( ie: thinking we know or understand all ) that is a dangerous point to be in
[2009/06/30 12:35] ***PH***: but sub/dom is the most personal thing you really can do to you (to admit where your balance focuses more) and to the other - that allows you o see who she/he really is
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***PH***: you cant get more intimate
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***PH***: no matter which role you play
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***PH***: 'role'
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***TR***: I would even go so far as to say
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***TR***: you need some balance to be good Dom/sub couple :)
[2009/06/30 12:36] Pirate Russell: you can always get more intimate, I've been with hubby 10 yrs, and there's still stuff I can share that he doesn't know.... some of those 'shifts'.. little though they may be. Adding to intimacy
[2009/06/30 12:36] ***PH***: (blimy my avi is sleepy on this poseball sorry for that)
[2009/06/30 12:37] Pirate Russell: ((I have begged and begged for new poses and steps, you see what I have after being her e over a year!))
[2009/06/30 12:37] ***PH***: :D
[2009/06/30 12:37] ***PH***: its not me its a poseball!
[2009/06/30 12:37] ***PH***: :D
[2009/06/30 12:37] Pirate Russell: Oh, it's ME!
[2009/06/30 12:37] ***JY***: Quote of the Year
[2009/06/30 12:37] ***PH***: of course Pirate but that is also new to you :)
[2009/06/30 12:38] ***PH***: not poseballs :D
[2009/06/30 12:38] ***TR***: yeah
[2009/06/30 12:38] ***TR***: if you would only show things after 10y something is not entirely right then :)
[2009/06/30 12:38] ***PH***: and sharing makes you2 equall
[2009/06/30 12:39] Pirate Russell: Not hiding, wating for it, just stuff that I'm reminded of by other things that happen
[2009/06/30 12:39] ***TR***: balance is not nescessarely quietness like a non moving lake
[2009/06/30 12:39] ***TR***: it can also be
[2009/06/30 12:39] ***TR***: waves crashing into the beach
[2009/06/30 12:39] ***TR***: binary stars :)
[2009/06/30 12:40] ***PH***: that is then a thin line in anykind of partnership SL/RL/equal/Dom/Sub
[2009/06/30 12:40] Pirate Russell: With D/s it's not a thin line, it's a wall, it's the power exchange that was agreed to .
[2009/06/30 12:40] ***VP***: Excuse me, Lady...I must go...thank you for you knowledge.
[2009/06/30 12:41] Pirate Russell: Yes, the wall get's breached, but it's not a thin line
[2009/06/30 12:41] Pirate Russell: Surely ***VP***
[2009/06/30 12:41] ***PH***: agreed
[2009/06/30 12:41] ***PH***: you hav that right
[2009/06/30 12:41] ***PH***: ahhh better ball
[2009/06/30 12:41] ***JY***: ( scrolls back up and reads distracted rl phone )
[2009/06/30 12:42] ***PH***: we all get dom-ed by rl :(
[2009/06/30 12:42] ***TR***: unfortunately
[2009/06/30 12:42] Pirate Russell: Ain't that the truffff!
[2009/06/30 12:42] ***PH***: such a unpleasant mistress
[2009/06/30 12:42] ***PH***: and its a she cause shes a bitch
[2009/06/30 12:43] Pirate Russell yanks this goatrope back into the right sim.... Respect. That is the Currency of Dominance
[2009/06/30 12:43] Pirate Russell smiles
[2009/06/30 12:44] Pirate Russell: And in the worst cases, a sub respects the position, not the person.
[2009/06/30 12:44] ***PH***: not really respect just enjoy to much :)
[2009/06/30 12:45] ***PH***: that happens here a lot
[2009/06/30 12:45] ***PH***: with males into female avis
[2009/06/30 12:45] Pirate Russell: Those are the game players
[2009/06/30 12:45] ***PH***: some of tham are really emerged but for the wrong reasons
[2009/06/30 12:45] ***PH***: them *
[2009/06/30 12:46] Pirate Russell: yes
[2009/06/30 12:46] ***JY***: I have a question of sorts Miss Russell and that is along the lines of being a Sl/RL Dominant .. what are your feelings on so called Fake Domiants ( Preadators / Posers ) in Second Life and if you notice it do you feel it's a responsibilty to try and show the submissive in this case what is wrong that you see personally ?
[2009/06/30 12:47] ***TR***: submissive should be smart enough to find it out him/herself really. being sub shouldn't be being dumb :) but yes we all get fooled sometimes
[2009/06/30 12:48] ***JY***: Well you see alot of " Submissives " in second life that think they goto a school you seem the kneeling every place just to kneel cause they think that is what they should do
[2009/06/30 12:48] Pirate Russell: The Fake Dominants, are why I took this job. I was spending too much time .... deprograming, or decompressing, abused submissives. I'm here with 2 basic messages... 1) Communication and 2) Do NOT rush relationshiops
[2009/06/30 12:48] ***JY***: see*
[2009/06/30 12:48] Pirate Russell: or relationships... he he
[2009/06/30 12:49] ***PH***: you have to know real sub is the one that practice or FEEL the same way being sub here means there is ' potential' in that person - and SL is a heaven for fakers - so be as smart as in rl
[2009/06/30 12:49] ***JY***: Nods
[2009/06/30 12:49] Pirate Russell: All of My submissives are RL submissive. Not necessarily in the lifestyle, but are really, honest to dog, submissivves
[2009/06/30 12:49] ***PH***: exactly
[2009/06/30 12:49] ***PH***: they maybe cant be in rl but they strive that freedom
[2009/06/30 12:50] Pirate Russell sees mostly males in that abusive role, but some females are doing it as well
[2009/06/30 12:50] ***JY***: Females here in second life correct
[2009/06/30 12:50] ***JY***: well most of them are male also so the first part is true ( all joking aside )
[2009/06/30 12:51] Pirate Russell: Now the other variable, is that female avi run by a male?
[2009/06/30 12:51] ***PH***: but here as u can change your alt you can change yi saw a lot of females doing that because they getdoes that matter?
[2009/06/30 12:51] ***PH***: in sl?
[2009/06/30 12:51] Pirate Russell knows a few that flat out say it in their profiles, but....
[2009/06/30 12:51] Pirate Russell: Not many!
[2009/06/30 12:51] ***PH***: gender shouldnt matter in sl rp
[2009/06/30 12:51] Pirate Russell: No, but, it can...
[2009/06/30 12:51] ***PH***: except if it matters to master
[2009/06/30 12:51] ***TR***: but then it's roleplay
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***JY***: well ***PH**** that is true but only if you treat all of SL as RP
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: but that is individual
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: exactly
[2009/06/30 12:52] Pirate Russell: it matters to Me. I don't play with boys, or girl avi's run by boys, if I know it.
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***TR***: respect/trust doesn't go well together with genderbending for me
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***JY***: I personally am not one that says Sl is sl and rl is rl cause it's falsehood
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: me neither
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***JY***: and D/s is not a RP for me .. it's a lifestyle
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: but we have to respect others SL too
[2009/06/30 12:52] Pirate Russell: The biggest misconception in these games
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: you just have to be really smart
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: :)
[2009/06/30 12:52] Pirate Russell: er Quote Unquote games
[2009/06/30 12:52] ***PH***: to find out whether u are played
[2009/06/30 12:53] Pirate Russell: If not smart, you have to be able to blow it off.
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***PH***: mhm
[2009/06/30 12:53] Pirate Russell: There are about 8 people in the million on SL that can break My heart.
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***TR***: some don't care I think - the "game", or the immersion, it's more important than the truhth
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***PH***: noooo
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***JY***: Actually Pirate that is untrue
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***PH***: :)
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***JY***: there is only 1 in sl that can break your heart and that is your self
[2009/06/30 12:53] ***PH***: ghawd exactly
[2009/06/30 12:54] Pirate Russell: Right, they are the ones I allow to affect Me in that way
[2009/06/30 12:54] Pirate Russell: The rest just get a mute, or delete from friends, whatever
[2009/06/30 12:54] ***PH***: but not letting other people close makes your experience and feelings poorer
[2009/06/30 12:54] Pirate Russell: I choose who gets under My skin, it's not an open door
[2009/06/30 12:54] ***PH***: you just have to have in mind that that can happen nd when it does you just say oh well
[2009/06/30 12:54] Pirate Russell: it's like that respect... it's earned
[2009/06/30 12:54] ***TR***: which is the whole point of SL really, it's safe to let someone close... or so most believe
[2009/06/30 12:55] ***PH***: we are all eall and emotions not actions are running at the same pace then in rl
[2009/06/30 12:55] ***PH***: or even slower
[2009/06/30 12:55] Pirate Russell: A little history... I met Hubby on AOHell... got to know him WELL before I ever saw him
[2009/06/30 12:55] ***TR***: that sounds familiar
[2009/06/30 12:55] ***PH***: same with PunTon story :)
[2009/06/30 12:55] Pirate Russell: so I understand well what's at stake in this bug-farm the Linden$ give us!
[2009/06/30 12:55] ***PH***: just that it started in this bloody place :)
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***PH***: but we both were honest
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***TR***: yes and both had our ahm... souls dipped in SL already
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***PH***: honest to know we dont have a clue what will happen when we meet :)
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***TR***: which made us pretty honest in the first place
[2009/06/30 12:56] Pirate Russell: Best of luck, obviously it worked for us! ;-)
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***PH***: and does for us
[2009/06/30 12:56] ***TR***: oh yes :)
[2009/06/30 12:56] Pirate Russell: I mean the RL part
[2009/06/30 12:57] ***PH***: jup
[2009/06/30 12:57] ***PH***: me too :)
[2009/06/30 12:57] ***PH***: im just not married yet (eyeballs ***TR***)
[2009/06/30 12:57] ***PH***: :D
[2009/06/30 12:57] ***TR***: that would be awesomely quick :p
[2009/06/30 12:57] Pirate Russell: I AM married, and I've been eyeballing all the girls! he he
[2009/06/30 12:58] Pirate Russell: in and out of SL!
[2009/06/30 12:58] ***JY***: Lawls
[2009/06/30 12:58] ***PH***: and the best thing about SL is that if you allow yourself to be you and find someone.. (:D)
[2009/06/30 12:58] ***JY***: ( excuse me for a second afk )
[2009/06/30 12:58] ***PH***: ... that is sticking to you - there is not much to go wrong :)
[2009/06/30 12:58] Pirate Russell: Yes, for you... for some they wanna be griefers whether they throw bombs, ro break hearts
[2009/06/30 12:58] ***TR***: a question into the RL, Pirate, if I may... where there distance issues to your going RL?
[2009/06/30 12:59] ***TR***: SL has more and more emotion-griefers yes
[2009/06/30 12:59] Pirate Russell: He was in Detroit, I was in Atlanta. Yes, some, but we had AIM, unlimited phone plans (We'd sit and watch "Who wants to be a Millionaire" on the phone and such
[2009/06/30 12:59] ***PH***: i prefere bombs
[2009/06/30 12:59] ***TR***: hehe all sounds alike yes
[2009/06/30 12:59] ***PH***: yeah your story is very familiar :)
[2009/06/30 13:00] Pirate Russell: Well, this is My 2nd Marriage, and I DEFINATELY traded up!
[2009/06/30 13:00] ***TR***: just change millionaire by american idol and phone plan to skype :p
[2009/06/30 13:00] Pirate Russell: There ya go!
[2009/06/30 13:00] ***PH***: \o/
[2009/06/30 13:00] ***TR***: \0/ even
[2009/06/30 13:00] Pirate Russell: But you brought up one more wrinkle...
[2009/06/30 13:00] ***TR***: yes?
[2009/06/30 13:01] Pirate Russell: I could answer that personal question, cuz no of y'all work with Me, go to My kids church, etc.
[2009/06/30 13:01] Pirate Russell: Anonymity eases embarrasment, a lot ofthe time
[2009/06/30 13:01] Pirate Russell: Though that question wasn't a bad one 'tall
[2009/06/30 13:02] ***PH***: yeah and provides pathway to manipulation so ... um i prefere not :)
[2009/06/30 13:02] Pirate Russell: Almost like going to an unfamiliar bar, and unburdening to a strange beertender!
[2009/06/30 13:02] ***PH***: it is totally the same
[2009/06/30 13:02] ***PH***: but is great if you have a 'partner in crime'
[2009/06/30 13:02] Pirate Russell winks at***PH***!
[2009/06/30 13:03] ***PH***: :)
[2009/06/30 13:03] Pirate Russell: 2 of My girls and My wife (also one of My girls) know more about Me, My marriage, My hubby, than ANYone within 500miles of Us
[2009/06/30 13:04] ***PH***: it is just great -i mean SL experience because you can actually do (virtually) what you wish for and feel probably better than you would in rl (it is still part of your fantasy and only you have the power to controll it)
[2009/06/30 13:04] Pirate Russell: And they're in CA, Wi, England, and I'm in ATL
[2009/06/30 13:04] ***PH***: :)
[2009/06/30 13:04] ***zA***: bye
[2009/06/30 13:04] Pirate Russell: Bye, ***zA***, thanks for moming
[2009/06/30 13:05] ***TR***: SL experience just helped me in finding out about myself
[2009/06/30 13:05] ***TR***: once there... I don't know it would bring any good feeling anymore really
[2009/06/30 13:05] Pirate Russell is not polyamorous, well is, cuz I LOVE My girls, but is Monosexual (with hubby), is not a lesbian, and is not a Domme, on this side of the keyboard
[2009/06/30 13:05] ***PH***: jup
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***PH***: you have the priviledge to experience more
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***PH***: well we all do
[2009/06/30 13:06] Pirate Russell: To be completed!
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***TR***: depends on how you are/feel
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***PH***: to find more about yourself
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***TR***: some intimacies are cheating to me
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***PH***: if you feel right of course
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***PH***: all of them ?
[2009/06/30 13:06] ***TR***: to myself that is
[2009/06/30 13:06] Pirate Russell: I know what I was missing, I was bi in college.... he he, but not since I got married the first time , YEARS ago
[2009/06/30 13:07] ***PH***: im bi he knows it im also sub/dom depends on the mood and he knows it and well its great to be me at last because of him
[2009/06/30 13:07] Pirate Russell: Hubby knows what I do here, he sits behind Me, OFTEN... and has only asked Me 3 things. No Voice (I can listen, but not talk, too much like a phone)
[2009/06/30 13:07] Pirate Russell: No face in any pictures I have out here.
[2009/06/30 13:08] Pirate Russell: and No RL meetings
[2009/06/30 13:08] ***PH***: allows you to be you
[2009/06/30 13:08] Pirate Russell: other than that, it's WFO! I choose not to play with known males, cuz it feels like cheating to Me!
[2009/06/30 13:08] ***PH***: jup
[2009/06/30 13:08] ***PH***: u have boundaries
[2009/06/30 13:08] ***PH***: we all do
[2009/06/30 13:08] ***PH***: but you are aware of them
[2009/06/30 13:09] ***TR***: and you have it right coz
[2009/06/30 13:09] ***TR***: cheating is not what your partner doesn't allow you
[2009/06/30 13:09] ***TR***: it's that PLUS what you yourself consider cheating
[2009/06/30 13:09] Pirate Russell: And we negotiated them, and I respect them
[2009/06/30 13:09] ***TR***: respect, exactly
[2009/06/30 13:10] ***PH***: cheating is not really about on which dick vagina sits ^^ to be myself - blunt
[2009/06/30 13:10] ***PH***: or where your mouth is
[2009/06/30 13:11] Pirate Russell: it's about your heart, and if you have to 'sneak'!
[2009/06/30 13:11] Pirate Russell: LIke I said, he sits here and watches ANYtime he wants! I'm in the livingroom!
[2009/06/30 13:11] ***PH***: and that is difficult place to sub/dom :)
[2009/06/30 13:11] Pirate Russell: Yes, it is
[2009/06/30 13:11] Pirate Russell: or would be
[2009/06/30 13:12] Pirate Russell: So, we've run over, I think I'm gonna call it a night
[2009/06/30 13:12] ***JY***: Pirate i have to comment off subject that i like your quote Quid quid Latine Dictum sit, altum videtur i had to google it only to find that what you put in ( ) under it is what it actually says gave me a smile thanks
[2009/06/30 13:12] ***TR***: being open like that is trust yes
[2009/06/30 13:12] Pirate Russell: He he
[2009/06/30 13:12] ***PH***: Thank you Pirate for a really nice talk
[2009/06/30 13:12] Pirate Russell: My pleasure
[2009/06/30 13:12] ***JY***: Thank you Miss Russell for your time do you have a tip jar
[2009/06/30 13:13] ***TR***: and even more trust is that you *have* to trust eachother coz of distance - it really shows yourself a thing or two
[2009/06/30 13:13] Pirate Russell: Yes and no.
[2009/06/30 13:13] ***PH***: :D
[2009/06/30 13:13] Pirate Russell: Any that care to tip, go to West of Ireland and donate to Project Children... or I can do it next week if I start wearing clothes again
[2009/06/30 13:13] ***JY***: something for your time was greatly appreciated
[2009/06/30 13:13] Pirate Russell: Thanks ***JY***, and thanks for your input
[2009/06/30 13:14] ***SV*** crashed and couldn't get back
[2009/06/30 13:14] ***JY***: and I shall go make a donation there also
[2009/06/30 13:15] Pirate Russell: Thanks, the sim is where My treasure works as an admin, so I call it her charity.. he he
[2009/06/30 13:15] ***JY***: yes ***SV*** they are doing server stuff according to the blog go figure
[2009/06/30 13:15] ***PH***: thank you once more and i rush :) thank you once more
[2009/06/30 13:15] ***PH***: thats 2 times
[2009/06/30 13:15] ***SV***: Thank you Miss Pirate
[2009/06/30 13:15] ***PH***: im really tired it seems
[2009/06/30 13:16] ***JY***: Well please take some rest and look foward to many more classes in the future
[2009/06/30 13:16] Pirate Russell: Thanks to y'all, I LOVE the discussion best
[2009/06/30 13:16] ***TR***: Thank you for a nice talk, will be back later
[2009/06/30 13:17] Pirate Russell: Ciao for now!

Erotic Humiliation - 6/29/09

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Erotic Humiliation - 6/26/09

[2009/06/26 12:06] Pirate Russell: OK, those that will, please turn off any radars, MystiTools, etc., to help with the Horrendous lag
[2009/06/26 12:06] Pirate Russell: Please take all cross talk to IM, and all collar, etc commands to the secondary channels!
[2009/06/26 12:06] Pirate Russell: Welcome to House of V's College of Kink! As most of y'all know, My name is Pirate Russell, Head Mistress of the College, and today's instructor. I have been in SL for 3 1/2 years, a lesbian Domme, the entire time.
[2009/06/26 12:07] Pirate Russell: For any that need to leave early, all transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/06/26 12:07] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:08] Pirate Russell whispers: WOW, this lag is KILLER
[2009/06/26 12:08] Pirate Russell: Erotic humiliation: The consensual use of psychological humiliation in a sexual context, whereby, at least, one person gains arousal or erotic excitement from the powerful emotions of being humiliated and demeaned, or of humiliating another;
[2009/06/26 12:08] Pirate Russell: often (but not always) in conjunction with sexual stimulation of one or both partners in the activity. The humiliation need not be sexual in itself, as with many other sexual activities it is the feelings derived from it which are sought, regardless of th
[2009/06/26 12:09] Pirate Russell: Consider that the desire to be beneath the other partner during intercourse,the idea of "getting caught" such as with having sex in the garden or woods, or mild rape fantasies (where the person imagines themselves to be forced in a way they would like,
[2009/06/26 12:09] Pirate Russell: and which must be seen as completely different to any real form of rape), are mild emotional games that emphasise status, vulnerability and control.
[2009/06/26 12:10] Pirate Russell: For instance, I found this vulnerable girl up at the club, and inspite of the suspending of Members' Day Rules, she will obey, she is controlled
[2009/06/26 12:10] Pirate Russell: However, for most people such ideas remain a fantasy and they would have strong reservations about it being made public, or engaged in with a partner for real, however erotic the idea may be.
[2009/06/26 12:11] Pirate Russell: If a person does reveal their fetish to their partners, this usually is a result of a huge amount of trust invested in them, due to the similarly huge psychological struggle they would have had to have gone through to tell them.
[2009/06/26 12:11] Pirate Russell: Many people have the worry of being ridiculed for their fetish, and such ridicule from their partners could be psychologically catastrophic.
[2009/06/26 12:12] Pirate Russell: Therefore, many people use online humiliation (where the humiliator and others are involved via the internet using chat, websites, SL, etc.) as a compromise between exhibitionism and reality on the one hand, and safety and anonymity on the other.
[2009/06/26 12:12] Pirate Russell: Humiliation can be verbal or physical, and can be relatively private or public.
[2009/06/26 12:12] Pirate Russell: Often it can become ritualized, and unlike some sexual variations it can also be easily carried out over a long distance or online.
[2009/06/26 12:13] Pirate Russell: For instance if I were to tell ***MR*** here, to take off her pants, she will in SL, and might in RL....
[2009/06/26 12:14] Pirate Russell: The distinction between humiliation and dominance in an activity such as erotic spanking is that the sought-after effect is primarily the humiliation; the activity is just a means to that end.
[2009/06/26 12:14] Pirate Russell: While mild or moderate humiliation is not an uncommon part of BDSM or other sexual roleplay, humiliation play can be taken to a point where it becomes emotionally or psychologically distressing to one or the other partner.
[2009/06/26 12:15] Pirate Russell: Erotic humiliation can become extreme enough to be considered a form of edgeplay, that some consider may best be approached with advance negotiation and use of a safeword.
[2009/06/26 12:15] Pirate Russell: This is a highly subjective issue, and depends greatly on the participants.
[2009/06/26 12:16] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:16] Pirate Russell: ~ Terminology and Overview
[2009/06/26 12:16] Pirate Russell: The person being humiliated is often called a bottom, and the person who humiliates them is often called the top,
[2009/06/26 12:16] Pirate Russell: (though these are standard terms used in general dominant/submissive role play and are not specific to humiliation interests) or if female, sometimes humiliatrix.
[2009/06/26 12:17] Pirate Russell: Other common names are slave or sub/submissive for the bottom, and Master/Mistress or Dom/Domme for the top.
[2009/06/26 12:17] Pirate Russell: ~Humiliation is not the same as dominance, as the devotee is not necessarily seeking to be ordered about.
[2009/06/26 12:17] Pirate Russell: Humiliation comes into its own as a sexual force when the devotee seeks the humiliation over and above the means; for example, when being spanked is primarily valued because of the belittlement involved.
[2009/06/26 12:18] Pirate Russell: As such, it encompasses a range of paraphilia (abnormal sexual activity), in particular foot fetish or shoe fetish, body worship, spanking, bondage and most BDSM styles.
[2009/06/26 12:18] Pirate Russell: It can be as basic as the desire to kiss and massage feet as a precursor to sex, or it can be complex, involving roleplay or public displays of subservience.
[2009/06/26 12:18] Pirate Russell: It can be for a set period of time (a "scene") or as an ongoing facet of a relationship.
[2009/06/26 12:19] Pirate Russell: The "humiliation" is not intrinsic to the act or the object. Rather, symbiotic, a relationship beneficial to each charged, by the shared attitude of the partners engaged in the act.
[2009/06/26 12:20] Pirate Russell: "***MR***, take off the chaps and stockings"
[2009/06/26 12:20] Pirate Russell: It is they who invest specific acts, objects or body-parts with a humiliating aspect.
[2009/06/26 12:20] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:20] Pirate Russell: ~ Means of Humiliation
[2009/06/26 12:21] Pirate Russell: Sexual humiliation is very open-ended. Broadly, it can be divided into verbal and physical aspects.
[2009/06/26 12:21] Pirate Russell: *Verbal aspects of this might include:
[2009/06/26 12:21] Pirate Russell: ** Mockery, derision and ridicule.
[2009/06/26 12:21] Pirate Russell: ** Verbal belittlement, such as "slave", "boy", "girl", "missy", "pet".
[2009/06/26 12:21] Pirate Russell: ** Insults and verbal abuse, such as "fat", "ugly", "stupid", "worthless".
[2009/06/26 12:22] Pirate Russell: ** Degrading references, such as "slut", "tart", "bitch" and "whore".
[2009/06/26 12:22] Pirate Russell: ** Slighting of body parts or behaviors, such as disparaging or cruel references to breasts, facial appearance, genitalia or genital size, bottom, and slighting of mannerisms such as walking, responsiveness, standard of self-care.
[2009/06/26 12:22] Pirate Russell: ** Having to ask permission for everyday activities such as going to the toilet, spending money or eating.
[2009/06/26 12:22] Pirate Russell: ** Small breasts humiliation, where scorn is addressed over the supposed inadequacy of the adult female's breasts, or her inability to please a man (and by implication her essential worthlessness as a woman), and her breasts become objects of fun.
[2009/06/26 12:23] Pirate Russell: ** Small penis humiliation, where scorn is addressed over the supposed inadequacy of the adult male's genitals, or his inability to please a woman (and by implication his essential worthlessness as a man), and his penis becomes an object of fun.
[2009/06/26 12:23] Pirate Russell: ** Forced repetition, such as being obliged to repeat back commands to confirm them.
[2009/06/26 12:23] Pirate Russell: ** Forced flattery, such as agreeing that every decision that the dominant makes is wise, correct, and justifiable, while additionally praising the dominant's physical and personality traits.
[2009/06/26 12:23] Pirate Russell: Well in MY case, that's not flattery, just the facts! he he
[2009/06/26 12:24] Pirate Russell: ** Reduction to Human animal roleplay or human pet, referring to these individuals as pet, dog, girl, bitch, or making them eat and drink from pet food and water bowls.
[2009/06/26 12:24] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:24] Pirate Russell: *Physical Humiliation:
[2009/06/26 12:24] Pirate Russell: Some sexual humiliation involves inflicting pain, but much of it is far more concerned with ridicule, mocking, degradation and embarrassment.
[2009/06/26 12:24] Pirate Russell: Physical and tangible aspects might include:
[2009/06/26 12:25] Pirate Russell: ** Wearing of external signs of "ownership", such as a collar.
[2009/06/26 12:25] Pirate Russell: ** Forced to wear a gag and/or restraints on the body.
[2009/06/26 12:25] Pirate Russell: ** Prohibitions or restrictions on clothing, even in public. For females a common example is being mandated to only wear revealing bikinis or lingerie. For men, this may include feminizing or cross-dressing.
[2009/06/26 12:25] Pirate Russell looks down at ***MR*** and giggles
[2009/06/26 12:26] Pirate Russell: Both sexes may be expected to go completely nude, with decorative objects such as collars, bands, tiaras, or cuffs being the only exceptions.
[2009/06/26 12:26] Pirate Russell: ** Having friends, family or strangers aware of or witnessing one's treatment (i.e.: public humiliation).
[2009/06/26 12:26] Pirate Russell: ** Use of chastity belts or other means of erotic sexual denial.
[2009/06/26 12:26] Pirate Russell: ** Suppressed freedom of movement. This may include never being able to leave the room in which the dominant is present without permission, and may be forbidden to leave the house or 'dungeon' in general for the duration of slavery or servitude.
[2009/06/26 12:27] Pirate Russell: ** Frequent performance of passive-aggressive sexual services for the dominant, such as erotic massage, cunnilingus, analingus, or fellatio, without expectations of reciprocal acts or intercourse.
[2009/06/26 12:27] Pirate Russell: ** Specific rituals and affectations to be adopted. This includes displays of subservience, such as, walking a pace behind the dominant, only speaking when spoken to, kneeling or prostrating in front of the dominant when expecting orders, eating only afte
[2009/06/26 12:27] Pirate Russell: ** Spanking, whipping, restraint or other BDSM activities such as cock and ball torture (CBT).
[2009/06/26 12:28] Pirate Russell: ** Performance of menial tasks or abusive workload, such as cleaning the floors with a toothbrush.
[2009/06/26 12:28] Pirate Russell: ** Detailed punishments for a variety of 'infractions' or misbehavior, such as having to stand in a corner facing a wall for several hours, flogging or whipping, reduced rations, or forced exercise.
[2009/06/26 12:28] Pirate Russell: ** Roleplaying "lower status" beings, such as animals (for example dog or horse) or babies (see human animal roleplay, pup-play and adult baby play).
[2009/06/26 12:28] Pirate Russell: ** Ejaculating, farting, defecating, spitting, slapping or urinating on the bottom's body, especially the face.
[2009/06/26 12:28] Pirate Russell: ** Erotic objectification, where the bottom is cast in the role of an object, such as a footstool.
[2009/06/26 12:29] Pirate Russell: ** Cuckoldry, taking on a third party lover to humiliate the bottom as an expression of the relationship between the top and the bottom.
[2009/06/26 12:29] Pirate Russell: ** Having to ask permission to orgasm during sex or masturbation.
[2009/06/26 12:29] Pirate Russell: The list is virtually endless, it all depends on what the bottom DOESN'T LIKE!
[2009/06/26 12:30] Pirate Russell: Sexual roleplaying may or may not involve humiliation. For example, one person might play the part of a dog because they enjoy being mock-forced into it, and the top will emphasize the lowness of the bottom's status as an animal.
[2009/06/26 12:30] Pirate Russell: Whereas another person might play the role of the dog without any element of humiliation, simply as an expression of their inner animal or playful spirit.
[2009/06/26 12:30] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:31] Pirate Russell: ~ Psychology of Humiliation
[2009/06/26 12:31] Pirate Russell: Humiliation in general touches strong emotional buttons, the more so when it becomes sexualized.
[2009/06/26 12:31] Pirate Russell: Because of this, consent and (paradoxically) a high degree of awareness and communication is needed to ensure that the result is desirable, rather than abusive.
[2009/06/26 12:31] Pirate Russell: For example, a submissive may enjoy being insulted in some ways, but be genuinely crushed and devastated if humiliated or insulted in other ways.
[2009/06/26 12:32] Pirate Russell: Humiliation play is also connected to sexual fetishism, in that non-sexual activities may become sexualized by association with arousal,
[2009/06/26 12:33] Pirate Russell: and also may be associated with exhibitionism in the sense of wanting others to witness (or being aroused by others witnessing) one's sexual degradation.
[2009/06/26 12:33] Pirate Russell: For some people, activities such as name-calling are a way of achieving ego reduction or getting over sexual inhibitions.
[2009/06/26 12:33] Pirate Russell: For example, between gay people, terms usually associated with homophobia may be used, such as "faggot" or "lesbo."
[2009/06/26 12:34] Pirate Russell: As with all sexual activities, some people have sexual fantasies about humiliation, and others actually undertake it as a lifestyle or in a scene.
[2009/06/26 12:34] Pirate Russell: Sexual fantasies relating to mild humiliation are not uncommon.
[2009/06/26 12:34] Pirate Russell: Some humiliation roleplay (pup-play and age play in particular) is combined with loyalty and care-giving to the extent that these fetishes can be seen as exercises in trust rather than primarily a humiliation fetish.
[2009/06/26 12:35] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:35] Pirate Russell: ~ Blackmail and Humiliation
[2009/06/26 12:36] Pirate Russell: The use of blackmail as a means to exact leverage over a humiliated individual is widely considered to be an extreme aspect of erotic humiliation.
[2009/06/26 12:36] Pirate Russell: In relationships where the humiliated discloses sensitive personal information to the humiliator, and the release of that information would be catastrophically devastating to life of the humiliated,
[2009/06/26 12:36] Pirate Russell: the consensual pretext of the relationship comes into question.
[2009/06/26 12:37] Pirate Russell: The humiliator could demand the humiliated to take embarrassing photos and later threaten to expose the photos to a spouse or family member unless they further submit or force them to comply to their monetary demands.
[2009/06/26 12:37] Pirate Russell: The legal implications of such an arrangement have not yet been explored.
[2009/06/26 12:38] Pirate Russell: .
[2009/06/26 12:38] Pirate Russell: ~ Online Humiliation - Why W/we're here!
[2009/06/26 12:38] Pirate Russell: Online humiliation is the desire to be seen in a sexually embarrassing context via the internet. This practice allows the submissive to seek fetish partners from across the world.
[2009/06/26 12:38] Pirate Russell: * Common methods of online humiliation include:
[2009/06/26 12:39] Pirate Russell: ** Public pillory
[2009/06/26 12:39] Pirate Russell: ** Embarrassing photographic or video assignments for submissives
[2009/06/26 12:39] Pirate Russell: ** The requirement for submissives to keep online journals, detailing personal information such as masturbation frequency and details
[2009/06/26 12:39] Pirate Russell: ** Verbal abuse
[2009/06/26 12:40] Pirate Russell: ** Publicly bidding for items that reveal their fetishes
[2009/06/26 12:40] Pirate Russell: ** Forcing them to go, or taking them to places where nudity isn't the norm
[2009/06/26 12:40] Pirate Russell: ** Forcing them to service others in public or private.
[2009/06/26 12:40] Pirate Russell: ** Leaving them bound in public places, dressed or not.
[2009/06/26 12:41] Pirate Russell: Again, the list is endless, it all depends upon what your submissive finds humiliating, embarassing, or degrading.
[2009/06/26 12:41] Pirate Russell: All transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[2009/06/26 12:42] Pirate Russell: Questions, comments?
[2009/06/26 12:42] Pirate Russell: Classes are Mo, Tue, and Fri at noon, right now.
[2009/06/26 12:45] Pirate Russell: No questions at ALL?!
[2009/06/26 12:45] Pirate Russell listens to the crickets.....
[2009/06/26 12:45] ***zA***: no sorry miss pirate not by me
[2009/06/26 12:46] ***RR***: Most of it sounds like people I know,,, not ot mention any names
[2009/06/26 12:46] ***CA***: hehe
[2009/06/26 12:46] ***VI***: Communicaiton, then seems to be the best way to not find yourself in an overly humiliating situation
[2009/06/26 12:46] Pirate Russell: But her initials are ***CA***?
[2009/06/26 12:46] ***RR***: YUp
[2009/06/26 12:47] Pirate Russell: And yes, ***VU*** as with any 'kink', if I don't know ***MR*** likes it, how can I do it?
[2009/06/26 12:47] Pirate Russell: or doesn't like it, why would I??!!
[2009/06/26 12:47] ***CA***: I've noticed that subs into humiliation often have a theme. Activities inside that theme almost always excite, but going outside that theme requires a lot more communication because like you say, it can go the exact opposite of fun in a hurry
[2009/06/26 12:47] ***VI***: nods at ***CA***
[2009/06/26 12:47] Pirate Russell: Good Point, "***MR***, enjoying yourself?"
[2009/06/26 12:48] ***MR***: a bit embarassing.... so.. it is fun
[2009/06/26 12:48] Pirate Russell smiles
[2009/06/26 12:48] ***RR***: yup sounds familiar
[2009/06/26 12:49] Pirate Russell takes whole weeks and runs around SL naked, not humiliating, houwever, it's My choice
[2009/06/26 12:49] Pirate Russell: ((Note to self: Schedule naked week, SOON))
[2009/06/26 12:49] ***VI***: giggles
[2009/06/26 12:50] Pirate Russell would start now, but don't wanna steal ***MR***' thunder... he he
[2009/06/26 12:50] ***CA***: and that's another point worth mentioning. Something you find embarrassing will bore me to tears, and vice versa.
[2009/06/26 12:50] Pirate Russell: Kinda like D/s in general, it's a relationship, and each relationship is as different as those, and the farm animals, that are in it!
[2009/06/26 12:51] ***CA***: yah
[2009/06/26 12:51] ***VI***: What is the best way to handle a scene when the humiliation takes a wrong turn?
[2009/06/26 12:51] ***RR***: safeword
[2009/06/26 12:51] Pirate Russell: Online: Safeword, go OOC, or even log out
[2009/06/26 12:51] ***VI***: nods
[2009/06/26 12:51] Pirate Russell: but for dog's sake COMMUNICATE as soon as you can.
[2009/06/26 12:52] ***CA***: and that's a really tough one to handle in the first place, since humiliation most often involves damaging one's reputation in some way, at its core. By the time it's gone too far, you may have caused damage you can't fix
[2009/06/26 12:52] Pirate Russell: That's why there needs to be negotiation at the begining of EVERY D/s relationship.
[2009/06/26 12:53] ***CA*** nods
[2009/06/26 12:53] Pirate Russell: Though Members' Day helped speed things along today.. he he
[2009/06/26 12:53] ***LL***: except you RP is about no negociation ;)
[2009/06/26 12:53] Pirate Russell: Even if it's a scene long, or a RL Life long relationship. Don't sign on, until you KNOW what you want and what you're willing to give up t o get it
[2009/06/26 12:53] Pirate Russell: not true, ***LL***
[2009/06/26 12:54] Pirate Russell: If I walk up and spank you with no talk, how do I know if that's what you like, or if it's a hard limit?
[2009/06/26 12:54] ***LL***: well who knows ;) except me
[2009/06/26 12:55] Pirate Russell: There has to be some chat go on, so you know you can even play with someone, what they wanna do, what gets thiem off, and what makes them log off, what you wanna do, and what will make you log off.
[2009/06/26 12:55] ***LL***: i mean sometimes RP is also about risk .. if all is negociated before you do ;) well might be boring
[2009/06/26 12:55] ***CA***: as a personal example of what I mean... There's a femdom sim where I'm a domme in good standing, and respected. If a dominant were to take me there and humiliate me, it might be fun... but it would irreparably damage my credibility there in a way I would be unable to fix
[2009/06/26 12:56] Pirate Russell: Unless those watching were informed it was a RP
[2009/06/26 12:56] ***CA***: even so, many would never understand
[2009/06/26 12:56] Pirate Russell: Then yes, that would have to be a big decision for you. If you're not willing to do that, then that's a limit
[2009/06/26 12:57] ***MR***: a "single shot game" that could worth being played.... ***CA*** *giggle*
[2009/06/26 12:57] ***CA***: hehe
[2009/06/26 12:57] Pirate Russell: Or if you decided that you didn't wanna Domme, anymore, then that would be a fun way to make sure it's permenant
[2009/06/26 12:57] ***CA*** nods
[2009/06/26 12:59] ***RR***: Or just keep Dommeing there & showing up here in a pantiless maids outfit
[2009/06/26 13:00] ***CA*** laughs and blushes
[2009/06/26 13:00] Pirate Russell: Or domme your subby while wearing that outfit
[2009/06/26 13:00] ***CA***: I dommed once wearing a pink bunny costume
[2009/06/26 13:00] Pirate Russell: As you can see, I'm not a 'traditional Domme'. I'm an exhibitionist, and a smart a$$
[2009/06/26 13:00] ***RR***: Everyone needs a hobby
[2009/06/26 13:01] ***CA*** grins
[2009/06/26 13:01] Pirate Russell: There is that!
[2009/06/26 13:02] ***VI***: Thank you Mistress for an informative class, as always i enjoyed it.
[2009/06/26 13:02] Pirate Russell: My pleasure
[2009/06/26 13:02] Pirate Russell: Any that feel the need to tip, please go to the West of Ireland sim and put the money to good use by donating to the "Project Children" fund
[2009/06/26 13:02] ***CA***: yes, great class!
[2009/06/26 13:02] ***RR***: Ya done good, Pirate
[2009/06/26 13:02] Pirate Russell: This is one of My favorites, and ***MR*** likes it too!
[2009/06/26 13:02] ***MR*** giggles
[2009/06/26 13:03] Pirate Russell: Well, class dismissed!
[2009/06/26 13:04] Pirate Russell: Thanks for coming, I enjoyed the discussion!
[2009/06/26 13:04] ***zA***: thank you miss porate
[2009/06/26 13:04] Pirate Russell: You're welcome zo
[2009/06/26 13:04] ***MP*** pokes , doesn't run away.
[2009/06/26 13:05] ***VI***: "well Shin did you enjoy it?"

BDSM Online vs. RL - 6/24/09

[12:05] Dominic Rahja: BDSM as it is online (SL) versus RL
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: as for an introduction I copied some text from a blog
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: dont worry about copy rights, they dont know Me rl
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: anyway
[12:09] Pirate Russell: Just cite the site, and you're clear! he he
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: what this pesron wrote was quite catching
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: its about bdsm online
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: here it cums
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: BDSM in a World without Pain
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: It’s hard to feel pain in virtual worlds; in fact, it’s downright impossible.
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: Simulate any other facet of life – love, childbirth, the perfect pair of shoes – but experiencing physical pain is out of bounds.
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: . No amount of roleplaying can recreate it. Real-life pain requires a real-life body, one thing virtual worlds just can’t provide.
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: (( note: this is not written by Me))
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: Not that anyone seems to be complaining.
[12:11] ***BM***: @
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: Virtual life has its advantages, and one of them is freedom from real-life restrictions like pain.
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: yes ***BM***?
[12:12] ***BM***: this may sound funny, but I know of subs who "mirror" in rl what is happening in sl, ie, hit themselves with a hairbrush or paddle for the pain factor
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: nods
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: we come back later to that
[12:13] ***BM***: I guess, I was disagreeing in a way. sorry
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: adding rl activities to online experiences is a topic
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: we'll talk about that after this intro
[12:13] ***BM***: I'll go back to my usual quiet self
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: ok, I go on
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: This freedom makes online environments ideal spaces for experimentation, both personal and sexual.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: Needless to say, virtual worlds are rife with exploration of all kinds, much of it kinky.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: But in worlds without pain, what happens to those very masters of kink, the men and women who know pain best, virtual sadomasochists?
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: Strangely enough, nothing.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: There are plenty of online BDSM communities practicing today.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: Just club-hop through Second Life and you’ll see that soon enough.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: Sensual contraptions straight from a torture chamber line the walls of semi-private rooms.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: Xcite! has begun selling floggers with realistically drooping tails.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: . Half the women on the street are calling out with their enormous, kinky boots, “Come on, hurt me!”
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: laffs
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: But you can’t. In Second Life, I can’t even hurt myself.
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: On a slow Monday evening, I strap my avatar into a S/M device that sends an enormous spike through my vagina, over and over and over. Imagination and projection are important here,
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: ((not My vagina btw))
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: certainly, but even in the mood, I can’t feel a thing.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: My avatar looks bored. The BDSM I’m used to, real-life BDSM, stings, burns, bleeds. This doesn’t even tickle.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: If S/M depends on physical sensation, then what’s this?
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: Maybe that’s the problem: we expect to feel.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: We wonder, how can something so often dependent on physical action transfer to an electronic environment?
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: But it doesn’t just transfer, it transforms.
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: BDSM in cyberspace becomes what it’s been at its root all along, a matter not of pain, but of control.
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: ok
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: this is what I believe is a rl lifes styler experiences in sl
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: she wants to feel
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: as like what ***BM*** added, of course there are ways to add some rl to it
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: but does that do the trick?
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: surely, sl provides us a way to explore
[12:20] ***BM*** smiles and waves to ***BH***
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: but its also a fact that it nearly comes close to rl
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: or am I wrong?
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: like in the last sentence of this intro:
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: is it the control that does the trick maybe
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: hello ***BH***
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: welcome to the college
[12:21] ***BH***: hello E/everyone
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: its a statistic fact that lots of people who never heard of something like bdsm, get in contact with it through sl
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: and many interested in it, look upon it as a cool kinky play
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: which it is of course and nothing wrong with that view
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: but for those who really wanna experience bdsm lifely
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: by touch
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: then sl is just a little too short
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: another problem that might occur..
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: is in what way is bdsm as it is offered in sl realistic
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: I mean:
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: if you do some search
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: you can type all kinds of kinky words
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: and it will give you an option
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: of places you can go to, to experience that
[12:25] ***TY***: @
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: (( if you got adult switched on hehe))
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: yes ***TY***
[12:25] ***TY***: I can only speak for myself... but I came to SL through a friend... who knew I was hurting due to the death of my rl Master... seeking the control and routine of bdsm while I worked through my grief and depression in rl... and that is what I found.... the control... the ability to have someone assist me with focusing on day to day activities
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: nods
[12:25] ***TY***: so from that standpoint
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: but in this manner you came to sl with knowing what you wanted
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: greets ***BW***
[12:26] ***TY***: it was for the most part a close proximity... but you are correct ... the physical component
[12:26] ***TY***: was lacking when comfort was needed and offered
[12:26] ***BW***: greetings Master Dominic
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: when i first joined sl, it was because people told me that I would find a good bdsm community here
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: which was true
[12:26] ***NZ***: waves to ***BW***
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: but 9 out of 10 got their first encounter with this life style here in sl
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: some turn their backs
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: and some wanna know more about it
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: for that last group we got the college here
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: and not to forget the school
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: but as I said:
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: we here talk about realism
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: but how realistic is sl
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: suppose
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: I hear about snuff
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: as something cruel
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: killing stuff
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: and just for the fun of it, I type it in
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: bingo
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: found places for it
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: but in the description of the place
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: is not only snuff mentioned
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: but also bdsm
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: is snuff the bdsm related?
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: probably because both words are put next to eachother
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: now you can say: hey, but sl snuff that aint rl
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: true
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: gladly u cant kill anybody
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: maybe shoot someone to the next sim lol
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: but he will survive that
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: but the point isd
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: that here on sl many places try to offer you the extremest kinky stuff ever
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: why is that?
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: traffic issue?
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: just fun?
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: sure
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: but is that bdsm?
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: dont think you'd like a Dom into snuff do you?
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: sl wise it doesnt matter maybe
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: but rl? hm
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: lately there has been some media hassle again about something linky in sl
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: about rape
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: suppose
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: you walk the streets of some urban place in sl
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: the place advertises: rape
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: and so it happens
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: at the corner of some dark alley, a guy humps ya
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: rp you'd say
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: yeah it is
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: but it can also happen you feel a bit scared with it
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: is it consensual?
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: hm
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: not really but
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: you knew what could happen
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: I show you some text about what happened
[12:37] Dominic Rahja: got this from another blog author
[12:37] Dominic Rahja: Just today, I read about Brussels police looking into a complaint of “virtual rape” within the game, Second Life.
[12:37] ***BM***: @
[12:37] Dominic Rahja: ***BM***?
[12:38] ***BM***: ok...it is consensual, sorry, but I can't see how it can be anything but....there are tp's, and in the worst case, how bout a power butten.
[12:38] Dominic Rahja: right
[12:38] ***BM***: a complaint of "virtual rape"..thats insane
[12:38] Dominic Rahja: the question is: can there be such a thing as rape in sl
[12:39] Dominic Rahja: rap roleplay wise is therefor something you agree to
[12:39] ***NZ***: someone could be so shocked its happening they dont think to TP out
[12:39] ***TY***: @
[12:39] Dominic Rahja: possibly baby
[12:39] Dominic Rahja: ***TY***?
[12:39] ***BM***: I don't think so...sorry...still have a power button, or walk away
[12:39] ***NZ***: and new to sl
[12:39] ***TY***: I would think if you are in a sim location that advertises rape
[12:39] ***TY***: you have given implied consent
[12:40] ***NZ***: happened to me when i wa new lolol
[12:40] ***TY***: now... if you are somewhere else....
[12:40] ***TY***: that's a different story
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: right
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: and thats what ***NZ*** means
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: I show you the rest of this blog text
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: it is a rl serious matter btw
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: Just today, I read about Brussels police looking into a complaint of “virtual rape” within the game, Second Life.
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: Wired even had a nice descriptive analysis on how virtual rape is traumatizing (and no doubt it is) when it is non-consensual.
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: But something just didn’t jive with all of this. Here’s my thoughts.
[12:41] ***BM***: @
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: First off, the younger players are filtered off on the Teen Grid while everyone else is on the main Grid.
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: after this article , you get your turn ***BM***
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: If a teen happens to lie and get a hold of adult qualifications or has an adult create the account,
[12:42] ***BM*** shakes her head...nvr mind
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: then they bypass the security measures in keeping them safe from any sexual activities that could happen on the main Grid.
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: Second, there is no possible way to force another avatar to do your bidding without that other player allowing control.
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: At least not to my limited knowledge.
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: I suppose you could be barraged by words over chat or IM, but there is this fancy schmancy thing called mute that can basically silence anyone from saying anything to you.
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: Believe me, I’ve done it many times when someone goes crazy in chat.
[12:43] Pirate Russell: @
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: I’m sure many people have hit the mute key on me too since I joke around all the time.
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: Holds ***BM*** and Pirate
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: You could potentially have stalkers (both in-game and real life), but as with any social environment, if you give too much information away, that’s just a potential risk.
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: So given the above, I’m not even sure how this would work.
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: Don’t get me wrong, virtual games come with some very real problems that could arise just as if you wandered around chat rooms except with these, it’s with avatars.
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: And I’m not belittling virtual rape, since that’s very wrong and no one should ever go through such things online.
[12:45] Dominic Rahja: I’m just trying to figure out the logistics behind how it can even possibly be done in Second Life due to the limitations of the game.
[12:45] Dominic Rahja: It almost doesn’t seem to be possible, at least in Second Life.
[12:45] Dominic Rahja: allright
[12:45] Dominic Rahja: ***BM***?
[12:46] ***BM***: please go on to pirate, I'm about to have a fit that someone would be able to waste our tax dollars on a courte case like this
[12:46] ***BM***: the girl had to choose right click sit
[12:46] ***BM***: and give permission to operate the ave
[12:46] Dominic Rahja: nods
[12:46] ***BM***: besides
[12:46] ***BH***: not really, with auto accepting relays and no control over them the only real option is to logout
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: surely media always try to create a hype over such things
[12:47] ***BM***: these sims advertise "rape role play" its not a suprise
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: no
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: you'll find it elsewhere on the net too
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: like today I found a forced fuck website lol
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: if I was shocked about it then I would hit the *leave* button wouldnt I
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: but I didnt hehe, but Im a perv
[12:48] ***TY***: lol
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: Pirate
[12:48] ***TY***: @
[12:48] Nane Pey is Online
[12:49] Dominic Rahja: ***TY*** on hold
[12:58] Dominic Rahja: ok
[12:59] Dominic Rahja: I started with the question: does sl bdsm offer the right bdsm
[12:59] Dominic Rahja: the girl in the introduction told us a definate NO
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: because she believes sl just lacks personal contact
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: which is true
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: on the other hand, there are many ways to add some real life to it
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: like the flogging you mentioned ***BM***
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: another point is..
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: the different aspects of bdsm in sl arent always realistic
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: they are sometimes too extreme
[13:02] Dominic Rahja: and are no part of bdsm in real
[13:02] Dominic Rahja: for instance rape isnt
[13:02] Dominic Rahja: rape as play in safe and consensual maybe
[13:02] Dominic Rahja: but not in a dark alley
[13:02] Dominic Rahja: surely, sl provides us kinky roleplay
[13:03] Dominic Rahja: and theres no harm in exploring it
[13:03] Dominic Rahja: as long you dont start believing you will encounter this all in rl
[13:03] Dominic Rahja: wehich in many cases is even impossible
[13:03] Dominic Rahja: think of dolcett in this way
[13:04] Dominic Rahja: nobody wants to be roast
[13:04] Dominic Rahja: in real
[13:04] Dominic Rahja: okay
[13:04] Dominic Rahja: any more questions, remarks
[13:05] Dominic Rahja: ok
[13:05] ***TY***: ty Sir Dom...
[13:05] Dominic Rahja: then I hereby end our session and I hope it was informative
[13:05] ***TW***: thank you Sir..
[13:05] Dominic Rahja: and sorry for the disruption
[13:05] ***AX***: thank you Sir Dominic
[13:05] Dominic Rahja: safe paths to you all
[13:06] Dominic Rahja: yw :)
[13:07] ***BM***: Thank you, Sir Dominic
[13:07] Dominic Rahja: yw ***BM***
[13:07] ***BM***: I hope I didn't make things difficult for you
[13:07] Dominic Rahja: not at all
[13:07] Dominic Rahja: I glad with your feed back
[13:08] ***BM***: Your classes have been informative thus far.
[13:08] Dominic Rahja: thanks

Daddy Play - 6/16/09

[12:02] Dominic Rahja: greets all at the college of kink
[12:02] ***NZ***: pff
[12:02] Dominic Rahja: today quite an unusual subject
[12:02] ***ES*** sits pretty.
[12:03] Dominic Rahja: one that got its pro's and againsts
[12:03] ***ES*** loves the topic and listens.
[12:03] Dominic Rahja: theres been a lot about it in sl a couple of years ago
[12:04] Dominic Rahja: todays topic is about Daddy and little girl -play
[12:04] Dominic Rahja: I call it in this matter daddy and girl
[12:04] Dominic Rahja: buut it might as well be Mom and boy
[12:05] ***NZ***: Hi ***TT***
[12:05] Dominic Rahja: this kinda of role setting got nothing to do with any mind of kids involved
[12:05] ***TT***: hello!
[12:05] Dominic Rahja: but it has a lot to do with BDSM as one of its aspects
[12:06] Dominic Rahja: Id like to start this class with a story I found on the net
[12:06] ***LS***: hey A/all
[12:06] Dominic Rahja: its a story written in a blog
[12:06] ***cP***: hey ***NZ***
[12:06] Dominic Rahja: hey ***LS*** and ***cP***
[12:06] ***LS***: hey Sir Dom and Goddess
[12:06] ***cP***: Sir Dom good to see you again
[12:06] ***NZ***: smiles
[12:06] ***LS***: heya Tess :)
[12:06] Dominic Rahja: ok here it comes..
[12:06] Dominic Rahja: btw, class is in text
[12:07] Dominic Rahja: I would like to read the story in voice but maybe ppll miss out then
[12:07] Dominic Rahja: + it might be heard in the club
[12:07] Dominic Rahja: allright
[12:07] ***TT***: ttrelease
[12:07] ***cP***: still rezzing
[12:07] Dominic Rahja: Silently i creep into Daddy’s room, crawling into bed beside Him. i whisper “Daddy, i’m cold tonight, can i sleep with You?”
[12:08] Dominic Rahja: “My baby is cold tonight? Snuggle Me baby and I’ll warm you up.” Pulling me close to Him, the warmth of His body against mine. It feels good.
[12:08] Dominic Rahja: “you know baby, if you sleep with Daddy, what is Daddy’s first rule?”
[12:08] Dominic Rahja: “i have to sleep naked” i can’t look Him in the eye, shyness takes over. i take off my tshirt.
[12:08] Dominic Rahja: “Panties too baby…you know better” He tugs at them. i slip those off and quickly get under the covers.
[12:08] ***ES*** listens intently.
[12:08] Dominic Rahja: “you know baby, I will make you do naughty things.” Daddy says.
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: “What kind of things Daddy?”, i reply, all of a sudden feeling very shy, and i feel a butterfly jump in my tummy.
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: “Like play with Daddy’s penis”, He says.
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: i hide my face in His chest and whisper, “but i like playing with Daddy’s penis, is that bad?”
[12:09] ***SF***: gasps
[12:09] Dominic Rahja: “It is baby, but it’s our secret, right?” he breaths into my ear. i softly respond “yes Daddy, i’ve not told anyone.”
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: “Good girl.” He pulls me closer to Him, taking my hand and putting it on His penis.
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: i feel the heat rise to my cheeks. “Do it like this baby.” He takes my hand showing me how to stroke His cock.
[12:10] ***LR***: "Ok that just made my girls a little wett".
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: Taking my hand and wrapping it around His shaft, He shows me how to stroke Him as i feel how hard He is becoming.
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: i hide my face a bit. “No baby, look at Me.” i look up at Him, feeling my cheeks become red.
[12:10] Dominic Rahja: “How do you like Daddy’s cock?” i murmur a bit…”it’s nice Daddy.”
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: i feel His hand smack my ass. “Speak up when you answer Me baby.” “i like my Daddy’s cock, it feels nice in my hand, and it’s getting harder Daddy.”
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: “What does your Daddy expect you to do when you make it hard baby?”
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: Making sure i look at Him and speak loud enough for Him to hear me.
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: “Daddy likes me to put His penis in my mouth and suck on it.”
[12:11] Dominic Rahja: “mmmm My baby remembers well… Good girl.”
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: ok laffs
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: later I send you the whole story if you like
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: but!
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: Im sure some of you think: yeah good story
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: and some of you got mixed feelings
[12:12] Dominic Rahja: the point is
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: you might think we are dealing witha child involved here
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: but thats not the fact
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: He is called Daddy and she loves sitting on his lap.
[12:13] Dominic Rahja: She is his little girl and she loves the fact that her daddy will take care of her and will make sure that she stays a good little girl.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: She is not under 16, 17, or even 18.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: She is a fully-grown woman, consenting to a dynamic where her dominant takes the position of a father figure with some additional be***NZ***its.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: They are not really father and daughter either, so there is no incest.
[12:14] Dominic Rahja: They are not breaking the law. They are simply living their truth.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: She can continue to be her little girl.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: She can run around like a teenager and be irresponsible sometimes.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: She knows she will be punished, but she knows that her daddy will not hold it against her either.
[12:15] Dominic Rahja: The daddy figure commands and earns the respect of his little girl and they have a dominant/ submissive type arrangement too.
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: These are not typical sadists or masochists.
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: There will be a fair amount of spanking, paddling or flogging, but you would not find a lot of hard-core pain play in this group.
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: There will be a bigger focus on sexual intimacy though and terms for this are different from the rest of the BDSM world.
[12:16] Dominic Rahja: The genitalia will be named as if this really were a little girl and her daddy will call her all the other names that other dominants use for their submissives.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: Although the average age of age players would be 10 to 14 in their "role", there are also prepubescent girls and "babies" in these relationships.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: A daddy might want a "baby" and his little girl (of 20 and upwards) would be the baby for him.
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: She would wear diapers and be fed like a baby would be.
[12:17] ***PH***: I have a question: a question why that young?
[12:17] Dominic Rahja: It is a different type of fetish, as not all people would really get this type of play.
[12:18] ***PH***: Why 10-14?
[12:18] ***CB***: wait til the end ***PH***
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: In a minute I take questions and remarks
[12:18] ***PH***: sorry
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: There are those in the lifestyle who confuse this type of relationship.
[12:18] Dominic Rahja: It has been proven over and over again that this little understood dynamic is actually a way of nurturance and accepting love and care from another who is dominant and has everything daddy never did,
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: even if there always was a daddy fantasy.
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: allright
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: ***PH***
[12:19] Dominic Rahja: you asked why this young
[12:19] ***PH***: i can wait untill the end im sorry
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: realise that this kind of relationship has a lot to do with the need of being guided
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: like a young kid got that need
[12:20] Pirate Russell: @
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: but in many cases people didnt have that kind of guidence
[12:20] Dominic Rahja: the Dom and sub in this case agree on what age the girlplays
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: and that can be a very young age
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: even into diaper age
[12:21] ***ES*** ponders this.
[12:21] ***TR***: Is this D/s play non sexual then?
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: the fact she has to "cleaned" makes her feel aroused
[12:21] Dominic Rahja: yes its very sexual
[12:21] Pirate Russell: And also humiliating
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: without arousal they wouldnt play this kind
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: and yes its humiliating
[12:22] ***PH***: its not humiliating at all
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: ok Pirate
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: you had a question
[12:22] Pirate Russell: No a comment, actually
[12:22] ***ES*** listens to Pirate.
[12:22] Pirate Russell: Kinda dovetails into the "every girl marries her father" addage! And it is a nice... "downtime" activity if dom and sub are both into it.
[12:22] Dominic Rahja: ok
[12:22] ***TR***: very stereotype thing to say
[12:23] Pirate Russell: Yes, it is, that's why I called it an "addage"
[12:23] ***ES*** giggles
[12:23] Pirate Russell: I married 2 men VERY different from My dad
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: well it is a fact that many young women are not much interested in their partners age
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: they much more look at personality
[12:23] Dominic Rahja: most women crave protection
[12:24] ***PH***: in a way true
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: and thats whata father figure symbolizees
[12:24] Pirate Russell: I don't know who said it, but "Women give sex to get security, Men give Security to get sex"
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:24] ***ES*** giggles
[12:24] ***ES*** looks around needing security.
[12:24] ***TR***: that line turns my stomach really
[12:24] Dominic Rahja: men and women have a totally different look upon the other sex
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: but yanno
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: they often say men only look at model kind of women
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: true but
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: they never marry them
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:25] Dominic Rahja: but thats off topic
[12:26] ***PH***: let me tell you something - it is the same with smart girls; off topic too
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: many subs do seek the same thing in a Dom
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: hehe yes PuNnka
[12:26] ***PH***: all real subs?
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: protection
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: guidence
[12:26] Dominic Rahja: someone whos wise and in control
[12:27] ***PH***: subs to pretend to be subs just cause they can get laid are not subs but (mature island) bloody idiots
[12:27] ***PH***: in control is the word :)
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: what role she plays in this doesnt really matter
[12:27] ***PH***: me silent
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: but it always comes down to someone they can rely on
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: if this is a daddy
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: then lots of people frown
[12:27] Dominic Rahja: same as when someone would wear diapers
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: why on earth wouold someone shit tgheir pants
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: still
[12:28] ***ES*** giggles
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: its a feeling from deep inside
[12:28] ***ES*** is housebroken.
[12:28] ***NZ***: lol
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: being pampered might be the best word to describe it
[12:28] Dominic Rahja: all in all..
[12:29] Pirate Russell: Thank you for sharing, puppy, ***NZ***, got anything yo uwanna share wtih the group?
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: in a Dom/ sub re;ation we always see certain roles played
[12:29] ***LR***: hm release
[12:29] ***NZ***: uumm not at this time why Miss
[12:29] ***CB***: I have a comment
[12:29] Pirate Russell: Well, as I teach EVERY week. D/s is a relationship, and each relationship is as different as the people, and farm animals, in it!
[12:29] ***ES*** giggles
[12:29] Dominic Rahja: nods
[12:29] ***PH***: exactly and Dominic it is not gender based
[12:30] Pirate Russell: if this ain't for you, then ROCK ON!
[12:30] ***PH***: and can be reversed if you are strong enough
[12:30] ***TR***: So Dominic, in your view, is D/s always about "fragile female" seeking "strong alpha male" for protection? Coz I don't agree to that
[12:30] ***ES*** finds her binky and curls up.
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: didnt say that ***TR***
[12:30] Dominic Rahja: in the daddy and lil girl roleplay it is
[12:30] ***TR***: I asked if this is your view, I didn't imply you said so
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: no thats not My view
[12:31] ***TR***: okay, I understand
[12:31] Dominic Rahja: there are so many roleplay within a D/s relationsghip
[12:31] ***TR***: how about D/s without roleplay?
[12:31] Pirate Russell: Nor is it the view of any Dommes. My girls are WAY stronger than I am, they can give themselves to Me. THAT takes strength, not frailty.
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: indeed
[12:32] ***CB***: Can I say something?
[12:32] ***ES*** smiles proudly at Pirate's words.
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: fragikle isnt the word
[12:32] Dominic Rahja: but in some roleplay, playing fragile is part of it
[12:32] ***PH***: typoneese is almost acknowledged to be a language
[12:32] ***TR***: Good view Pirate
[12:33] Pirate Russell: The word is "submission" They submit themselvesto Me, and as My ibrew said yesterday, "it's an alignment of wills"
[12:33] ***TR***: it takes strength to truly (and not play it) lose your control and give it to someone
[12:33] ***PH***: they respect you that much to submit thats why i had issues with ages
[12:33] Dominic Rahja: within the Dady / lil girl play btw its not always the fragile girl that comes up front
[12:34] ***CB***: Even though the 2 are consenting to play the daddy/lil'girl thing...in their heads ..and it's in both their heads... the idea that the girl is a "little girl" is something I would be ashamed of admitting to playing. It smacks of peadophilea and I know it isn't but it's acting it out.
[12:34] Mon Mathy is Offline
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: I know ***CB***
[12:34] ***PH***: if 2 adults consent beause of the reason of rp that is ok
[12:34] Dominic Rahja: I think most of us are aware of that risk
[12:34] Pirate Russell: Every scene is not for every body.
[12:34] ***PH***: because that person by doing that turns you on
[12:35] Pirate Russell: look at ***ES***, she's puppified, but that's not for Me, so I just dont' do it
[12:35] Mon Mathy is Online
[12:35] ***ES*** woofs.
[12:35] ***ES*** is a baby puppy.
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: I think that when we walks the paths of sl, and we read daddy's lil girl in a tag, we shake head a bit
[12:35] ***LS***: puppified.....cool word btw
[12:35] Dominic Rahja: but we may not judge right away
[12:36] ***PH***: well idk really much about that i saw it worse
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: this kind of roleplay is part of bdsm
[12:36] ***TR***: As the french say, les gouts et les couleurs, ca ne se discute pas
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: means ***TR***?
[12:36] Pirate Russell: And how would the Americans say it, ***TR***?
[12:36] ***TR***: colors & tastes can't be discussed
[12:36] ***TR***: kinda :)
[12:36] ***PH***: they would censor it *
[12:36] Dominic Rahja: nods
[12:37] Pirate Russell: Yeah, that's WAY true!
[12:37] Pirate Russell: Both the saying, and the censor comment
[12:37] ***TR***: lol
[12:37] ***PH***: ^^
[12:37] Dominic Rahja: if you visit a bdsm club in rl..
[12:37] ***PH***: BDSM for me excercising in a rl means more that everyday respect
[12:37] Dominic Rahja: you might encounter this kind of relationships
[12:38] ***PH***: u cant see relationships in a club :)
[12:38] Dominic Rahja: we see with our own eyes its both adults involved
[12:38] Pirate Russell: Ok, ***PH***, activities
[12:38] Dominic Rahja: here in sl we are not always sure of that
[12:38] ***PH***: ^^
[12:38] ***PH***: u cant be sure of anything in sl
[12:38] ***PH***: thats why i respect avis :)
[12:39] Dominic Rahja: thats why we are afraid that if we tolerate this, we encourage pedophilia
[12:39] ***PH***: depends how you pack it
[12:39] Dominic Rahja: but by LL policy of not allowing this play, they hurted sincere bdsm adult roleplayers
[12:39] ***PH***: that is why i jumped out
[12:39] Pirate Russell: It could be an outlet for the latent pedophilia, that is better than an actual child, too!
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: nods thats true too Pirate
[12:40] ***TR***: yes; a question then - do the avi's actually represent 10-14yo or is it, even with "grown up" Avi's, merely a roleplay?
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: in rl you cant be the size of a child
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: in sl you can
[12:40] Pirate Russell: For some they could, and for some not
[12:40] ***PH***: agreed but please let all get it straight no under 18 and not willingly to participation any activities are involved here or anywhere else with BDSM content
[12:40] Dominic Rahja: you can look how u want
[12:41] ***LR***: Unlewss you know a good Wich Doctor.
[12:41] ***PH***: because sl is a sewer
[12:41] Dominic Rahja: hehe ***LR***
[12:41] ***PH***: here u have all
[12:41] ***LR***: THen you can shrink them
[12:41] ***TT***: bitty
[12:41] Pirate Russell: And that's part of what this bug-factory called SL is for! to do stuff you can't or wouldn't in RL
[12:41] ***CB***: bitty !!!!
[12:41] Pirate Russell: I can't fly!
[12:41] ***CB***: nooo
[12:41] ***TT***: bitty!!
[12:41] ***LR***: Not NOW little girl. You just fed Daddy
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: laffs
[12:42] ***NZ***: lol
[12:42] ***ES*** dun like bugs.
[12:42] ***AK*** giggles
[12:42] ***ES*** sniffs for cookies.
[12:42] ***PH***: ghawd food again !
[12:42] ***TT***: daddy doesn't want any more bitty? My bobies need to squirt really bad.
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: for the oldies amongst us..a couple of years sl came in the news with a scandal
[12:42] Dominic Rahja: we all know very well
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: a german reporter made notice about child abuse in sl
[12:43] ***PH***: no but really House of V had a good aspect on BDSM overall
[12:43] ***LR***: Ok so This brings a thought to mind. Why dose no one bat an Eyelash when she calls Me Daddy.
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: and within a couple of days this news spread over the world
[12:43] ***PH***: 1st of all that is Lindens issue THEY allowed it to happen
[12:43] ***LR***: But the Momoent I put my lips to her tit and Call her Miommy I'm a Pervert?
[12:43] ***PH***: if ever ^^
[12:43] ***PH***: no u are not because u know she is not
[12:43] Dominic Rahja: sure they have let it happen
[12:43] ***LR*** Griz
[12:44] ***AK*** giggles
[12:44] ***PH***: they cant really controll every human mind
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: but the reaction to it was completely insane
[12:44] ***TT***: be a good boy and suck on mummy's titty
[12:44] ***PH***: it was normal
[12:44] ***NZ***: LAFFS
[12:44] ***ES*** giggles
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: as soon sl gets bad news, then they just restrict it
[12:44] ***NZ***: sorry Master
[12:44] ***PH***: itl like having a umm pigs flu somewhere and uhoh we all are at dangeour :D
[12:44] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:45] ***PH***: u have to be smarter than regulative to have peace of your body soul and intelect :)
[12:45] ***ES*** nibbles on cookie from Mr ***cP***'s hand.
[12:45] Dominic Rahja: heres a reminder of sl reaction 2 years ago
[12:45] ***PH***: im my point of view being a sub means i totally trust and respect -not fear my dom
[12:46] Dominic Rahja: Clarification of Policy Disallowing "Ageplay"
Posted by Kend Linden on Nov 14, 2007 12:10:57 AM
[12:46] ***PH***: i could fear him if i do something wrong
[12:46] Dominic Rahja: We’ve had a number of questions from Residents regarding Second Life’s policy regarding sexual “ageplay,” i.e., depictions of or engagement in sexualized conduct with avatars that resemble children.
[12:46] ***PH***: but boundaries are within trust
[12:46] ***PH***: and respect
[12:46] Dominic Rahja: This practice has been disallowed in recognition of our Community Standards, complaints from Residents, and international laws, so it’s important to understand the definitions.
[12:46] Dominic Rahja: Under our Community Standards policy, real-life images, avatar portrayals, and other depictions of sexual or lewd acts involving or appearing to involve children or minors are not allowed within Second Life.
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: When detected, individuals and groups promoting or providing such content and activities will be subject to sanctions, which may include termination of accounts, closure of groups, removal of content, and loss of land or access to land.
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: etc.
[12:47] ***TR***: well SL rules is SL rules
[12:47] Dominic Rahja: since then every sim got a height meter]
[12:47] ***TR***: You are a guest here so...
[12:47] ***TR***: but yeah
[12:47] ***TR***: most avi' are oversized here
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: when you are a short girl ( looks at ***NZ***)
[12:48] ***TR***: if you are 1m70 you look like a kid
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: then your doomed
[12:48] ***LS***: lol
[12:48] ***TR***: Yes this actually happened
[12:48] ***TR***: bunny avi
[12:48] Dominic Rahja: sim owners are paranoid cause of sl threats
[12:48] ***TR***: removed from a club for being "a child"
[12:48] ***NZ***: hey lol i cant help im only 5 foot real life lol
[12:48] ***LS***: whaha
[12:49] ***LS***: aw
[12:49] Dominic Rahja: and they have banned residents and deleted sims cause of it
[12:49] ***TR***: in a cartoon world, and this is, what is to be defined a child?
[12:49] ***TR***: how about japanese manga avi's?
[12:49] ***LS***: gotta go, take care A/all
[12:49] ***TR***: they are ageless
[12:49] ***NZ*** spanks ***LS***'s ass
[12:49] Dominic Rahja: same think I think ***TR***
[12:49] Dominic Rahja: thing
[12:49] ***ES*** giggles
[12:49] ***LS***: ouch...
[12:49] ***PH***: they are cuuute!
[12:49] Dominic Rahja: c ya ***LS***
[12:50] ***LS***: bye Sir Dom, bye Goddess :)
[12:50] ***NZ***: bye bad boy
[12:50] Dominic Rahja: but as long someone isnty involved in sexual acts it should be ok
[12:50] Pirate Russell: My girl ibrew has been asked to leave from several clubs, and she has this to pass on to the owners. Dom may I quote some?
[12:50] ***CB***: no it's not right that grown man ava looks good having sex with a child avi
[12:50] ***PH***: ohhh look i was kicked out of GOL having a bunny avatar :)
[12:50] Dominic Rahja: we got tiny's here
[12:50] Pirate Russell: I've included a couple of textures containing images i took after being thrown out of your club. If you will take the time to look at them, you will see there are some obvious differences between a normal, adult avatar and a child avatar.
[12:51] Dominic Rahja: but as soon a sim owner sees a lil girl in a pink dress and blond curled hair
[12:51] Dominic Rahja: then they get paranoid
[12:51] Pirate Russell: The adult has a natural shape, the child avatar is somewhat distorted because of the need to set shape parameters beyond what was expected when Second Life was developed
[12:51] ***PH***: for sl i just dont care because still sim owners are the masters :)
[12:51] Pirate Russell: Note in particular the difference in chest shape and breast size and shapes. The child avatar has a more barrel shape to the chest, and in an attempt to disguise the existance of breasts, they are flattened and deformed. The feet/leg/torso/head proportions are also quite different in the child avatar.
[12:51] ***TR***: that's the problem with SL - there is rules, but no "judge" or "jury" - just AR's and off you go
[12:51] Pirate Russell: Now i am aware that my avatar has a rather flat butt and not the typical 54EEEEE bust, but, if you look closely, you can tell that it is definetly not a child avatar.
[12:51] Pirate Russell: Unquote
[12:51] ***PH***: if i for example wouldnt like red haired guys and uh i would pay for a sim i would for sure excercise my belief
[12:52] ***PH***: well check me out im normal to every human proportion :)
[12:52] Pirate Russell: And then we're asked to go... he he
[12:52] ***PH***: idk anymore :)
[12:52] Pirate Russell: Me to, I'm 5'6" in RL and SL
[12:52] Dominic Rahja: Im glad I got an avatar with chest hair
[12:52] ***PH***: i just find ppl that i care what they are saying
[12:52] Dominic Rahja: hahaaa
[12:52] ***PH***: i <3 u
[12:52] ***PH***: can i T?
[12:52] ***ES*** hugs Pirate.
[12:52] ***ES*** claps paws for Dominic.
[12:52] Dominic Rahja: laffs
[12:52] Dominic Rahja: anyway
[12:53] Pirate Russell is no longer going the "Amazon Way"
[12:53] Dominic Rahja: I believe that because of this hype in sl, people got afraid of the daddy/ girl roleplay
[12:53] Dominic Rahja: its looked upon as an unlawful act
[12:54] ***ES*** growls at lag.
[12:54] Dominic Rahja: but in reality. IT IS a bdsm aspect
[12:54] ***PH***: and it is consent !
[12:54] Dominic Rahja: as long of course adults are involved and no real children
[12:54] Dominic Rahja: yes its in consent
[12:54] ***PH***: that was my point before
[12:54] Pirate Russell claps for freedom, and choice!
[12:54] ***PH***: or a q :)
[12:55] ***TR***: turn and twist as you like, SL isn't freedom, it's a business
[12:55] ***PH***: cause i like my daddy
[12:55] Dominic Rahja: but thats always a fact
[12:55] ***TR***: goverened by state law
[12:55] ***TR***: and we are all guests to them
[12:55] ***TR***: so yup we need to obey the rules
[12:55] ***TR***: until SL moves to sealand :p
[12:55] ***PH***: so u wont be my daddy anymore?
[12:55] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:55] ***PH*** sad
[12:55] ***TR***: shup you, no choco tonight
[12:55] ***ES*** whimpers.
[12:55] ***PH***: im really sad now :(
[12:56] Dominic Rahja: you know what I wonder about?
[12:56] ***ES*** hugs ***PH***
[12:56] ***PH***: can oyu?
[12:56] ***ES*** wants her to smile.
[12:56] ***PH***: cant :(
[12:56] Dominic Rahja: if those who were into this rp before sl disallowed it, still do
[12:56] ***PH***: oh hell yes
[12:56] Dominic Rahja: or are afraid some tattler will prosecute them
[12:57] ***PH***: ^^
[12:57] ***PH***: nah
[12:57] ***TR*** will bring Punpun green cote dor
[12:57] ***NZ***: throws a bone an some catnip
[12:57] ***PH***: iii i did good - i guess
[12:57] ***ES*** thinks everything takes some level of trust.
[12:57] ***PH***: nom!
[12:57] ***ES*** does not talk about Daddy play to just anybody.
[12:57] ***PH***: it is the same here
[12:57] ***ES*** giggles
[12:57] ***PH***: rl gouverment or sl gouverment
[12:57] Dominic Rahja: in any way, I wouldnt mind putting a pacifier in My ***NZ***s lil mouth
[12:57] ***PH***: i dont agree wit either
[12:58] Dominic Rahja: keeps her still
[12:58] ***PH***: but still thrive
[12:58] Dominic Rahja: hehe
[12:58] ***NZ***: wwwhhaaa
[12:58] Dominic Rahja: hey
[12:58] ***ES*** sucks on her bink proudly.
[12:58] ***ES*** does not smile until ***PH*** does.
[12:58] ***NZ***: tugs at your zipper
[12:58] Dominic Rahja: the notecard I selected, including the whole story..
[12:59] ***PH***: u should get here a sub that loves it to explain why does he/she love it :)
[12:59] ***PH***: maybe that would unveil some secrets :)
[12:59] Dominic Rahja: I'll send that to you if interested
[12:59] ***PH***: no!
[12:59] ***ES*** wants.
[12:59] ***PH***: dats mine!
[12:59] Dominic Rahja: yes true PuNnka
[12:59] Pirate Russell: And I'll add it to the blog once I get caught up!
[12:59] ***PH***: can i swap sub dom :)
[12:59] ***PH***: so im not the right one
[12:59] Pirate Russell: or more accurately, AS I get caught up
[12:59] Dominic Rahja: ok. Ill give it to Pirate
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: as I look around class..
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: I knew this subject would feed you for a reaction
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: still its a good subject to think about
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: and maybe
[13:00] Dominic Rahja: I hope
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: you wont judge ppl into such play too fast
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: smiles
[13:01] Dominic Rahja: thanks all for attending this college of kink

***Story***
Silently i creep into Daddy’s room, crawling into bed beside Him. i whisper “Daddy, i’m cold tonight, can i sleep with You?” “My baby is cold tonight? Snuggle Me baby and I’ll warm you up.” Pulling me close to Him, the warmth of His body against mine. It feels good.
“you know baby, if you sleep with Daddy, what is Daddy’s first rule?”
“i have to sleep naked” i can’t look Him in the eye, shyness takes over. i take off my tshirt.
“Panties too baby…you know better” He tugs at them. i slip those off and quickly get under the covers.
“you know baby, I will make you do naughty things.” Daddy says. “What kind of things Daddy?”, i reply, all of a sudden feeling very shy, and i feel a butterfly jump in my tummy.
“Like play with Daddy’s penis”, He says. i hide my face in His chest and whisper, “but i like playing with Daddy’s penis, is that bad?”
“It is baby, but it’s our secret, right?” he breaths into my ear. i softly respond “yes Daddy, i’ve not told anyone.” “Good girl.”
He pulls me closer to Him, taking my hand and putting it on His penis. i feel the heat rise to my cheeks. “Do it like this baby.” He takes my hand showing me how to stroke His cock. Taking my hand and wrapping it around His shaft, He shows me how to stroke Him as i feel how hard He is becoming.
i hide my face a bit. “No baby, look at Me.” i look up at Him, feeling my cheeks become red. “How do you like Daddy’s cock?” i murmur a bit…”it’s nice Daddy.” i feel His hand smack my ass. “Speak up when you answer Me baby.” “i like my Daddy’s cock, it feels nice in my hand, and it’s getting harder Daddy.”
“What does your Daddy expect you to do when you make it hard baby?” Making sure i look at Him and speak loud enough for Him to hear me. “Daddy likes me to put His penis in my mouth and suck on it.” “mmmm My baby remembers well… Good girl.”
i start to move to do this but Daddy pushes me back on the bed. “Not yet baby, I’m going to make you beg to suck Daddy’s cock tonight.” He begins to pull at my nipples. It hurts a bit, but instantly i feel a stirring and i don’t want Him to stop. He kisses me and moves to my neck, biting me. His hand starts to move down my tummy.
“Has my baby been good and not touched herself?” my mind races, i think back over the last few days. “No Daddy, You told me i couldn’t.” His hand reaches my smooth pussy. “I see my baby has been keeping My pussy, just as Daddy likes it.” He moves His mouth down to my nipples and sucks one in, biting it. i jump a bit from His teeth around my nipple. His fingers finding His sweet pussy wet.
“My baby is getting excited.” i draw in my breath as He plunges His fingers inside me, and He rubs my clit with His thumb. A moan escapes my lips. His fingers probing, His teeth finds my nipple again. He nibbles on it, stopping short to suck in my nipple. my body jumps.
His fingers inside me, working His magic, my body curving underneath His hands. Daddy pulls back, slaps the inside of my thighs, “Open them wider”, grabbing a leg and opening them wider. “baby, do you know what this is right here?” His fingers are back inside me, stroking deep, upward. i shake my head no. “It’s what is called a G-spot, hows does it feel baby?” escaping my lips, in a soft voice full of lust now…”it feels really good Daddy.”… breathless.. i feel the wetness between my legs, Daddy plays me like His guitar. Strumming me, i feel His every chord deep in my soul. i reach for His cock. i feel how hard it is.
“Does baby want something?” i am lost in His fingers, His voice, the heat of His body next to mine. i whimper, i am putty in His hands. “What was that baby?” “i want to explode Daddy” “you mean you want to cum baby?” “oh yes Daddy, please may i?” “Yes baby, cum for your Daddy.” i release and explode with His fingers inside me, my pussy contracting around them.
i can’t take it, i crave to have Him inside me now. “Daddy please can i suck on Your cock?” His fingers feel like they are going deeper inside me, the heat i feel, i am consumed, and more than anything i want His cock in my mouth. i want to feel how hard it is, and i want to take Him deep into my mouth. “What’s that baby?” “please please Daddy i need to have Your cock in my mouth.” “mmmm My baby sounds hungry.”
Daddy lets me go, lays back and i immediately get down on my knees, taking His cock into my hands. i stick out my tongue and lightly lick the head of His cock. “mmmm baby is gonna tease me a bit? is that wise?” i softly suck on the head of His cock. He grabs me and pulls me over on top of Him. “I need to taste that lil sweet pussy of mine” Pulling my hips down onto His face. “Daddy loves when His baby lays on top of Him.” He pulls my pussy down onto His mouth, as His tongue starts to lick at my juices. i feel like a puddle.
i take His cock deep in my mouth as i feel His tongue plunge deep into my pussy. i feel my body start to tense again, and i can’t hold still. His tongue attacks my clit, and i feel a bolt go through me and i explode on His tongue. He starts licking my pussy up again. Sucking His cock, taking Him deeper inside, i swirl my tongue around His shaft. Daddy has trained me well, i know how He loves His cock sucked by His baby. Daddy is fucking me with His tongue. i can’t help but meet every thrust of His tongue.
i feel His fingers move, opening and exploring me. “What’s this baby?” i feel His fingers pressing, opening me… extremely shy now. i feel so small. Breathlessly i say…”it’s my ass Daddy.” “Whose ass?” i feel His hand come down on it. “It’s Your ass Daddy, You own it.” “What can Daddy do with that ass?” “Anything He wants” “That’s right and what does Daddy like to do with it?” i feel His hand spank it again. i feel myself getting wetter.
“Daddy likes to put His fingers in it, sometimes His tongue and He likes to put His cock in it, and fuck it.” “What does my baby like?” i reply softly, so shy when He asks me questions like this. “i like when You do all of those things Daddy.” “My baby is a naughty girl, good girl.” i feel His fingers go inside me again, getting them wet as He turns us onto our sides, He opens my legs wider, and i feel His finger start to enter my ass. i almost purr at this, i take His cock in deeper then. Sucking His cock, using my tongue, moving my hand with mouth, His cock in and out of my mouth.
His mouth finds my clit and sucks it in, swirling His tongue around, it’s like electricity going through my body. His finger fucking my ass. i can’t take it..”Daddy.. i’m going to cum..” “Give it to Me baby, i want it.” His pace goes faster and He is pulling at my clit. i am in a frenzy now as i explode and my body shivers and shakes. i say with urgency “Fuck me Daddy.” “My baby need fucking?” “God yes Daddy, i need Your cock inside me.”
Daddy flips me onto my back, pulling me to the end of the bed, throwing my legs over His shoulders, pulling my hips to the edge. He enters me, deep, taking Him all in. He leans forward, grabbing my hands pulling them above my head. i am pinned under Him as He is driving His cock deep inside me.
“Is this what you needed?” “Yes Daddy.” “you like fucking baby?” “Yes i do Daddy.” He is looking into my eyes. “How come?” i still feel bashful when He asks me these things. “Because it feels good Daddy.” “And you’re a naughty girl, aren’t you baby.” “Yes Daddy, i’m a naughty girl.” Daddy starts fucking me harder, deeper. my knees are touching my shoulders and my legs are bent up over His shoulders and He has my hands pinned above my head. i can’t move and i’m on fire.
He leans down sucks on my ear and begins to bite me, this sends me over the edge. i begin to cum and Daddy pumps His hard cock into me. He pulls out of me, releasing me and again flips me onto my stomach pulls my ass in the air, i feel something cool run down my ass. “Daddy’s gonna fuck His ass now.” i feel the head of His cock start to enter me. Daddy is slow and gentle and i relax as He strokes my back. He enters me more and i feel myself relax around Him, taking Him in. He goes deeper, until He fills me up. He holds me there, stroking my back. He begins to move inside me. Fucking my ass. He reaches up and grabs my long ponytail. and starts fucking me good.
“baby, reach down and play with your clit.” i do as i am told. “Feel good baby.” Again, i feel so shy. Because yes i love this, i love this closeness i feel with Him, and yet i feel so shy admitting it. “Yes Daddy.” i can’t seem to say anything more, as i feel myself getting ready to cum again. “I’m going to cum in this ass baby… right… now.” i feel Daddy fill me up, and i cum with Him. Feeling my ass clench around His cock. He leans down on top of me. Kissing my neck and back. Holding me. He says in my ear. “I love when my baby spends the night.”

He is called Daddy and she loves sitting on his lap. She is his little girl and she loves the fact that her daddy will take care of her and will make sure that she stays a good little girl. She is not under 16, 17, or even 18. She is a fully-grown woman, consenting to a dynamic where her dominant takes the position of a father figure with some additional benefits. They are not really father and daughter either, so there is no incest. They are not breaking the law. They are simply living their truth. She can continue to be her little girl. She can run around like a teenager and be irresponsible sometimes. She knows she will be punished, but she knows that her daddy will not hold it against her either.

The daddy figure commands and earns the respect of his little girl and they have a dominant/ submissive type arrangement too. These are not typical sadists or masochists. There will be a fair amount of spanking, paddling or flogging, but you would not find a lot of hard-core pain play in this group. There will be a bigger focus on sexual intimacy though and terms for this are different from the rest of the BDSM world. The genitalia will be named as if this really were a little girl and her daddy will call her all the other names that other dominants use for their submissives.

Although the average age of age players would be 10 to 14 in their "role", there are also prepubescent girls and "babies" in these relationships. A daddy might want a "baby" and his little girl (of 20 and upwards) would be the baby for him. She would wear diapers and be fed like a baby would be. It is a different type of fetish, as not all people would really get this type of play. There are those in the lifestyle who confuse this type of relationship. It has been proven over and over again that this little understood dynamic is actually a way of nurturance and accepting love and care from another who is dominant and has everything daddy never did, even if there always was a daddy fantasy.

Clarification of Policy Disallowing "Ageplay"
Posted by Kend Linden on Nov 14, 2007 12:10:57 AM
We’ve had a number of questions from Residents regarding Second Life’s policy regarding sexual “ageplay,” i.e., depictions of or engagement in sexualized conduct with avatars that resemble children. This practice has been disallowed in recognition of our Community Standards, complaints from Residents, and international laws, so it’s important to understand the definitions.
Under our Community Standards policy, real-life images, avatar portrayals, and other depictions of sexual or lewd acts involving or appearing to involve children or minors are not allowed within Second Life. When detected, individuals and groups promoting or providing such content and activities will be subject to sanctions, which may include termination of accounts, closure of groups, removal of content, and loss of land or access to land.
There are three key aspects, which are in breach of the Community Standards:
(1) participation by Residents in lewd or sexual acts in which one or more of the avatars appears to represent minors (or the depiction of such acts in images, video, textures, or text) is a violation of the Community Standards;
(2) promoting or catering to such behavior or representations violates our Community Standards. For instance, the placement of avatars appearing to represent minors in proximity to “sex beds” or other sexualized graphics, objects, or scripts, would violate our Community Standards, as would the placement of sexualized “pose balls” or other content in areas depicting playgrounds or children’s spaces;
(3) the graphic depiction of children in a sexual or lewd manner violates our Community Standards.
We understand that in some cases there may be an element of subjectivity as to whether an avatar (or other image) appears to be a minor. Objective factors which will be used to decide include whether an avatar has child-like facial features, is sized as a child, has clothing or accessories generally associated with children, and whether, based on the circumstances, an avatar is speaking or acting like a child (e.g. “My Mommy says…”).
If you are in doubt as to whether an activity may be interpreted as ageplay, we request you err on the side of caution and desist. Please note that some countries’ laws may impose penalties for graphics, drawings or anime that resemble child pornography, even where no children have been involved.
Linden Lab reserves the right to immediately terminate the accounts of Residents who violate these standards.
Of course, any images, chat or other conduct which leads us to believe actual minor children are involved will lead to swift action, including reporting to the appropriate authorities.
Please note it does not violate this policy merely to have a child-like avatar. It is not our intent to banish child-like avatars in and of themselves.


Source: BBC News, 9th May 2007, 10:35 GMT
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/6638331.stm?ls
Second Life is being investigated by German police following allegations that some members are trading child abuse images in the online world.
The investigation follows a report by a German TV news programme which uncovered the trading group and members who pay for sex with virtual children.
The police are now trying to identify the Second Life members involved.
Linden Lab, the creator of Second Life, said it would help identify users and pass on details to prosecutors.
The investigation was carried out by Nick Schader from the Report Mainz news programme who is also a member of Second Life.
Mr Schader was asked to pay to attend meetings where virtual and real child pornography was being shown.
Members of this group also offered to put him in touch with traders of real child pornography.
The investigation also uncovered so called "age play" groups that revolve around the abuse of virtual children.
Information gathered during the report was passed to the prosecutor's office in Halle who said it hoped to track down the German Second Life user who shared the images of virtual child pornography.
Peter Vogt, the prosecutor in the Halle, told the Deutsche Presse-Agentur agency: "I assume we are going to catch this user fairly quickly."
Under Germany law possession of "virtual" child pornography is punishable by up to three years in jail.