Scene Safety - 1/27/09

[0:36] Srilania Svoboda: Ok, please take all cross talk to IM, and all collar, etc commands to the secondary channels!
[0:36] Srilania Svoboda: Please also turn off or remove any radar, scanners, or sleep Mystitools so lag is reduced.
[0:36] Srilania Svoboda: Welcome to House of V's College of Kink! I'm the Newd Teacher, Srilania Svoboda, and your instructor for this lesson.
[0:36] Srilania Svoboda: While I have only been in Second life for about six months, I have been about in the real world for many years, as well as out in other realms of the internet, as a submissive, then became a Domme, which I have done for about 5 years.
[0:36] Srilania Svoboda: For any that need to leave early, all transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[0:37] Srilania Svoboda: Today's class is on Scene Safety
[0:37] Srilania Svoboda: or
[0:37] Srilania Svoboda: "What's the number to 911?"
[0:37] ***TV***: lol
[0:37] Srilania Svoboda: And yes, if you have ANY questions during this, please feel free to speak up. I'm not above pausing the lecture portion to make sure a question gets answered
[0:38] Srilania Svoboda: And better to get a question out when it is fresh, than to wait and forget to ask it
[0:38] ***TV***: or statements and comments?
[0:38] Srilania Svoboda: Many people come to Second Life in order to experience BDSM. Some are quite knowledgeable, doing it for many years.
[0:38] Srilania Svoboda: Most, however, come with no knowledge, and not only pick up how to do things in Second Life, but try taking it to the Real World.
[0:39] Srilania Svoboda: There is nothing wrong with this, as we all start somewhere in everything, and Second Life is a relatively safe place to explore and learn.
[0:39] Srilania Svoboda: But, some people choose to reenact what is done to them in Second Life, paddling and beating and tying themselves up.
[0:40] Srilania Svoboda: There is nothing wong with this, but it does require a bit more caution and care.
[0:40] Srilania Svoboda: First thing is communication. Both sides should be made aware there will be real life components involved.
[0:40] Srilania Svoboda: Beyond emotions and feelings
[0:40] Srilania Svoboda: Safewords are a MUST when doing this type of play. This is not just merely some animations smacking prims into someone's avatar.
[0:41] Srilania Svoboda: The person you're smacking with that flogger is on their own end, swinging a real flogger into their body as you do it to their avatar.
[0:41] Srilania Svoboda: A safeword allows for the submissive to quickly stop play in case there is a severe problem.
[0:42] Srilania Svoboda: If voice is not going to be used so verbal checkins can be done, then a non verbal system should be in place, such as hitting random keys and enter to let people know they are all right.
[0:42] Srilania Svoboda: Also, a lack of coherent responses stops play within a set timeframe can signal something is wrong, and play stops till the person becomes responsive again.
[0:43] Srilania Svoboda: Most times, they are fine, and just in a hypnotized or a high from being in subspace, and need to come down a little for safe play to recommence
[0:43] Srilania Svoboda: During this time, do your best to apply aftercare, bringing them down from their subspace high.
[0:44] Srilania Svoboda: Also, before play, on the person doing the action's end, they have a few things they should do as well.
[0:44] ***AG***: Does "aftercare" mean something specific??
[0:44] Srilania Svoboda: For one, they should keep a phone handy, and always within reach, just in case an emergency.
[0:45] ***TV***: Everyone is different when it comes to aftercare
[0:45] Srilania Svoboda: Yes. Aftercare is what Dominants and submissives do to ease them coming down from their respective spaces
[0:45] ***TV***: but I think its one of the most imporant parts of the play time.
[0:45] Srilania Svoboda: It is, and Specifics of aftercare is important enough that it is planned in a future class
[0:46] ***AG***: I am totally new to this, sorry
[0:46] Srilania Svoboda: It's quite all right. You are one of the people these classes were designed for and offered for
[0:46] ***AG***: ty :o)
[0:47] Srilania Svoboda: But even the experts learn a thing here and there, and I've even come away from these classes learning new things
[0:47] Srilania Svoboda: Noone knows it all, and any that claim it are morons
[0:47] ***TV***: Agrees
[0:47] Srilania Svoboda: This is because one does not know if an emergency could arrise that would cause medical attention to be neccessary.
[0:48] Srilania Svoboda: Sorry, this thing only goes forward, and that was in regards to keeping a telephone within reach
[0:48] ***TV***: Srilania wouldnt you suggest they do a preplay check list of medical conditions such as diabetic or if they are a bleeder etc.-
[0:49] Srilania Svoboda: Yes. That is DEFINITELY part of Communication
[0:50] Srilania Svoboda: Because it's going BEYOND just a mental scene, played out on a screen. Someone is ACTUALLY doing something to themselves
[0:50] ***TV***: I dont think i have ever done that before so no concept of it sorry.
[0:50] Srilania Svoboda: Medical conditions ESPECIALLY are important
[0:50] ***TV***: Agrees
[0:51] Srilania Svoboda: If you have Hemophillia, and get high into subspace, your play partner could scratch or poke and you'd mimic this in a hypnotized state, and not even realize it
[0:52] Srilania Svoboda: But by communicating these issues BEFOREHAD, you do ensure your play partner won't cross those boundaries
[0:52] Srilania Svoboda: And yes, you can need immediate attention if you have an accident and do something to yourself.
[0:52] Srilania Svoboda: A wrong jerk, twitch, or movement could cause you to dislocate joints, cut too deeply, nick a vein or artery, or even be unable to get loose.
[0:53] Srilania Svoboda: Having a small emergency first aid kit nearby, within reach, is also a good idea.
[0:53] Srilania Svoboda: Even if you just wind up just letting it sit there and collect dust, it is something you should always on hand.
[0:54] Srilania Svoboda: You never know when you'll wake with a bad headache, and need some pain relievers, let alone emergency ice packs, bandages, burn ointment, or other items.
[0:55] Srilania Svoboda: True story, just a couple months ago I accidentally burned myself with some waxplay, and needed burn ointment
[0:55] Srilania Svoboda: Because my first aid kit is in a drawer next to my bed, I had it handy to handle the burn
[0:55] ***PS*** smiles
[0:56] Srilania Svoboda: Instead of having to get dressed, go DOWN to the bathroom, undress, put ointment on, then redress, go to my room, then undress again
[0:56] Srilania Svoboda: If it was an emergency and the first aid supplies were just in the bathroom, I'd have been in trouble
[0:57] Srilania Svoboda: If you are going to be doing any play where you are going to be hitting, poking, or other things where you cannot see unaided, keep a small mirror.
[0:57] Srilania Svoboda: Sometimes, you could hurt something, such as break the skin with a whipping cane, and not even realize you have done so.
[0:57] Srilania Svoboda: There are a lot of restraints out there. A lot of people like doing some kind of bondage in these scenes.
[0:57] Srilania Svoboda: To do rope bondage safely, there are already good videos out there. Twisted Monk has a good series on their website.
[0:58] Srilania Svoboda: http://twistedmonk.com/
[1:00] Srilania Svoboda: Also, a web search for Two Knotty Boys will yield a torrenting site with their entire video set.
[1:00] Srilania Svoboda: Since I last checked, seems other sites besides YouTube have allowed TKB videos to be hosted One is here
[1:00] Srilania Svoboda: http://www.livevideo.com/media/tag/two-knotty-boys.aspx
[1:00] ***PS***: Hello Hel
[1:01] Srilania Svoboda: Both resources are free, and will help teach the basics of rope bondage better than I could in Second Life.
[1:01] ***HF***: hello Sir
[1:01] Srilania Svoboda: That and the people they use to demonstrate these techniqus are SMOKIN hot usually
[1:02] Srilania Svoboda: However, the best knot to tie off with, especially for single play, is a slip knot.
[1:02] ***HF***: sorry Miss
[1:02] Srilania Svoboda: This is a knot that leaves a little tail that can be pulled with ease to release the knot, and is excellent for emergency releases.
[1:02] ***PS*** smiles
[1:03] Srilania Svoboda: I actually recommend that tie off knot for all major bondage related tying, as it allows for quick, safe releases without the need for any sharp objects to be brought near the person
[1:03] Srilania Svoboda: Other, more complicated knots should be avoided, as they can become impossible to open if the restrained person is high or in severe pain.
[1:04] Srilania Svoboda: Also, a pair of specialized scissors can come in handy, to cut restraints that are difficult.
[1:04] Srilania Svoboda: Usually these are marketed as EMS Safety Scissors
[1:05] Srilania Svoboda: It is important to note that one should never ever ever restrain both hands to the point they cannot get loose.
[1:05] Srilania Svoboda: There have been instances where a person has been restrained alone, and have been unable to free themselves and have even died because they were unable to call for aid.
[1:06] Srilania Svoboda: This was dramatized in the novel Gerald's Game, by Stephen King.
[1:06] Srilania Svoboda: Those not into horror, it is about a woman who goes to her summer house with her husband for some kinky sex.
[1:06] Srilania Svoboda: It's in the late fall, so noone is around the area. He has a heart attack and dies after handcuffing her to the bed.
[1:06] ***SQ***: :(
[1:06] ***PS***: :(
[1:06] ***AG***: wow
[1:06] Srilania Svoboda: Most of the story is about her trying to get free, and what she does to get free, almost dying in the process.
[1:07] Srilania Svoboda: Which does bring us to locking restraints.
[1:07] Srilania Svoboda: Handcuffs, chains, or leather restraints with working cuffs are nice for scenes at a safe place.
[1:07] Srilania Svoboda: NOT in a transitional scene from Second Life to Real Life.
[1:08] Srilania Svoboda: Hate to be the killjoy, but those police issue handcuffs? probably NOt a good idea if you're alone and playing through Second Life
[1:08] ***AG***: lol
[1:09] Srilania Svoboda: If the restrained person gets into a panic, or is too dazed to handle working the key in a lock, they could come under serious harm.
[1:09] Srilania Svoboda: Best bets are either use restraints with a quick release safety catch, or use an alternative to locking restraints, such as quick clips, or rope.
[1:09] Srilania Svoboda: Personally, I'm a big fan of rope
[1:10] Srilania Svoboda: besides the fact it's dirt cheap
[1:10] Srilania Svoboda: When self restraining, try to keep one hand free, so you can not only handle emergencies better, but can also do things to yourself.
[1:10] ***PS*** nods
[1:10] Srilania Svoboda: During a scene, it is also important to keep any supplies and emergency care items on hand.
[1:11] Srilania Svoboda: You don't want to hog tie yourself and find your fave riding crop is across the room
[1:11] Srilania Svoboda: If you're doing fire play, have an extingusher.
[1:11] Srilania Svoboda: Needle play? Bandages and antiseptics should be on hand.
[1:11] Srilania Svoboda: But, riskier edge play, such as knife play, breath play, needle play, and the like SHOULD be avoided unless there is someone on hand in Real Life to help you if there should be a problem.
[1:12] Srilania Svoboda: And yes, Edge Play does happen, even when it is discouraged, which is why I include cautions against doing these activities, but still give safety tips on handling such play
[1:13] Srilania Svoboda: Once a scene is done, Aftercare is critical.
[1:13] Srilania Svoboda: Blankets should be on hand, as well as some kind of food or drink.
[1:13] Srilania Svoboda: Sugars are best, as they deliver quick energy to help with dealing with subdrop, and blankets help if you're cold.
[1:14] ***AG***: subdrop??
[1:15] ***HF***: kind of sweet ?
[1:15] ***HF***: like a pear drop
[1:15] Srilania Svoboda: Adagio, have you ever done a scene as a submissive, and after the scene is done, suddenly find yourself severely depressed, crying, trembly, shaky, or just an itense feeling of isolation or abandonment?
[1:15] ***HF*** nods
[1:16] ***AG***: uh, no, guess i have that to look forward to.............
[1:16] Srilania Svoboda: A GOOD Dominant will apply aftercare and you shouldn't have to go through it
[1:16] ***PS*** smiles
[1:17] ***PS*** looking at her Mistress
[1:17] ***AG***: tnx, i think i understand
[1:17] ***YU*** grins
[1:17] Srilania Svoboda: But, I personally keep by my bed a huge thing of sweet tarts, Smarties, and hard candy. it allows rapid sugar to be pumped into the bloodstream, especially if held under the tongue
[1:18] Srilania Svoboda: During aftercare, keep things gentls, slow, and soothing.
[1:18] Srilania Svoboda: gentle
[1:18] Srilania Svoboda takes out her bullwhip and beats her typist
[1:18] ***HF***: owww
[1:19] Srilania Svoboda: If voice is being used, talk softly, with no grunting, growling, or hardness to your voice.
[1:19] Srilania Svoboda: If no voice is being used, the best thing is a good cuddle setup, and talk soothingly.
[1:19] Srilania Svoboda: Which is really good to do even when using voice
[1:19] Srilania Svoboda: Finally, once things have settled, make sure you get proper feedback. Not just that day, but a few days later.
[1:19] Srilania Svoboda: You don't want to sit there and start another session if they are still really sore from the last one.
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: And you don't want to do something that they have found to be a hard limit.
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: Next weeks class will be Kink on the Cheap: getting free or cheap BDSM gear for Real World Applications.
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: Questions, opinions, feelings?
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: Please feel free to feed the Teacher. I eat Linden Dollars as well as most types of blood, and the occasional stray victim!
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: All transcripts can be found at http://collegeofkink.blogspot.com
[1:20] Srilania Svoboda: For Class times and topics, Y/you would always check the Search/Events and look for College