The Write Stuff – Cybering Tricks and Tips - 12/9/08

[0:44] Zealot Benmergui: Welcome A/all to the House of V’s College of Kink. My name is Zealot Benmergui, Baron BardHaven and I will be your host today. Some of you may know me from lecturing here at House of V and other locations around the grid. Others of you may know as the voice of Thruster the Shy Stallion in the direct to DVD animated film “My Little Pony IV– Lord Symbian Rides”.
[0:45] Zealot Benmergui: The topic for today is "The Write Stuff – Cybering Tricks and Tips”. Today we will look at the oft maligned skill of cybering, and give a few tips on how to pose more effectively when getting lucky. Please note that for the purpose of clarity, I will tend to use “she” to refer to a submissive and “he” to refer to a Dominant, but either can be of any gender. Your humble lecturer WILL accept tips, but they must be paid to me directly, if you are so inclined, thank you.
[0:46] Zealot Benmergui: Keep in mind this a very limited overview...for a far more indepth examination, ***SS*** will be starting a six part course in Cybering soon here at The House of V
[0:47] Zealot Benmergui: Cybering is a topic near and dear to many hearts. According to some people, very little actually happens in SL other then cybering…or trying to cyber…or resting after cybering…or buying cloths to attract people for cybering. It is certainly an important part of many relationships online and therefore is deserving of some serious consideration. The concept of writing sexual descriptions back and forth with someone for the purpose of arousal dates back a long, long time.
[0:47] Zealot Benmergui: When Paleolithic man first began putting up cave drawings to depict important activities like hunting, I am quite sure in a side room he drew little stick figures fucking. When the first letter was delivered by the brave Pony Express riders in the American West, I am quite sure somewhere in the first paragraph was “What are you wearing…”
[0:48] Zealot Benmergui: However, cybering did not always have the graphical bells and whistles it does now, even online.
[0:48] Zealot Benmergui: Online, cybering was originally known as Tinysex, as it was done on the state of the art textual virtual worlds called TinyMUDs. Now it is more involved, and often can involve the use of voice or webcams, but it is still the same concept…using shared words to depict sex between two or more people, often involving masturbation though it is not required.
[0:49] Zealot Benmergui: In fact, I have long thought of good cybering as a form of shared erotica, and rather than just a way to describe a sex act, I feel that cybering can be, or should be, its own class of sexual activity altogether.
[0:50] Zealot Benmergui: Now before you get too deep into the concept of cybering as a proper sex act, there are some things we need to discuss first as ground rules and understandings. Cybering is a delicate topic because it is a blend of both pure technique and emotional connection.
[0:51] ***SS***: And at least a few active brain cells
[0:51] Zealot Benmergui: sometimes more the a few
[0:51] Zealot Benmergui: *than
[0:51] Zealot Benmergui: Without emotion, cybering is stupid and clinical, without technique, cybering is laughable and just a lot of moaning. For this lecture we will look at it purely as technique, and let you draw in the emotional aspect at your leisure with some baby oil and a good vibrator.
[0:52] Zealot Benmergui: Boiled down it its basics, cybering is a form of writing even when spoken, and can be mastered, or at least improved, just like any other writing skill. Cybering however has certain rules to follow that right off the bat will improve the effect you have on your partner. Forget breast implants or penis pumps, learning a few well selected words and writing techniques will make you a hottie in just a few minutes. So, what bits of simple sheer writing technique can we apply to cybering?
[0:53] Zealot Benmergui: First, remember that good cybering is a duologue, not a monologue. It is an exchange between two or more people (well, ideally people), not just a soliloquy. You may have always wanted to play Hamlet, but it is best not to start “To be or not to be”ing with your cock out. When done well, cybering is a call/response situation, so each entry should be self contained, but not too long.
[0:56] Zealot Benmergui: Try when you can to limit each entry to two or three sentences, and try to keep each one focused on a single idea or action. Long paragraphs tend to meander and lose the immediacy you want in a good pose. You want to be sure you give your partner enough to respond to, but not too much that they don’t know where to start.
[0:56] Zealot Benmergui: Also, try to leave things as open ended as you can. Very specific descriptions of physical positions you are in can leave your partner with no way to respond, and unable to do what she had wanted. Often when neither partner is really paying attention to each other, she will be describing giving him head while he is describing entering her ass. Physically difficult and philosophically challenging, at the very least.
[0:57] Zealot Benmergui: Posing “I tie your ankles to the mantelpiece at a 170 degree angle; your knees crossed the left over the right as I stand over your chest dripping Low-cal Vinaigrette dressing on your breasts, your arms tied akimbo to the hindquarters of a starving Great Dane…” really doesn’t leave her much to do except moan..or say “What was my safe word again, your deviant little prick?”. Try to leave things open ended enough to allow for her own desires and style to be posed back at you.
[0:58] Zealot Benmergui: Also of vital importance is to remember to pose what YOU do or feel, not what they are doing or feeling. If you write something like...."I slowly drive the garden gnome deep into your hungry cunt as you scream and thrash, howling that you are in love with me and begging me to drive the gnome’s little pointed hat up into your uterus so that you can cum like Tinkerbell on acid while I butter your feet.”…that is bad.
[0:59] Zealot Benmergui: That is called Powerposing...writing both your action, and their reaction...and doesn;t leave your partner anywhere to go or even much to do. What if they are allergic to full-fat dairy products? Or what if they like garden gnomes, but not in that way? Nothing will bore your partner faster than if you TELL them how they are reacting to what you are doing. Also, it gives them the impression you don’t give a fuck what they want to add or can bring to a scene…you just want to hear yourself talk, or in this case, gnome.
[1:00] Zealot Benmergui: Therefore..pose your OWN action or response, leaving a hook for your partner to easily connect their response to, such as “I slowly ram the Gnome into your slick lovehutch, looking into your eyes as I whisper "Tonight bitch, you are my mushroom circle...."..waiting to twist the gnome, watching your eyes as I grip it by the little ceramic boots, now greasy with girljuice...”
[1:00] Zealot Benmergui: That gives her something to respond to, a way to steer the scene in the direction she may want, and also references many disturbing fairy terms.
[1:01] Zealot Benmergui: Another reason you don’t want to write long paragraphs for each pose is, well, the internet is the great distracter. If she ends up sitting there waiting 10 minutes for you to pose, when you finally get around to cumming all over the gnome, she is already reading a post on Yahoo about Madonna’s divorce….and who can blame her?
[1:02] Zealot Benmergui: So to sum up…a good cybering pose focuses on a single action or reaction with clean, brief prose, only describes your OWN actions and responses, and has a sense of urgency or immediacy…and gnomes.
[1:03] Zealot Benmergui: As I said, for far more indepth information, look to Miss Svobada's course, but as this is a great topic for getting examples of what you all like or hate in cybering, I now give you a minute to swap battaries and then on with the discussion
[1:04] Zealot Benmergui: Is there anything you really HATE in a cyberscene?
[1:04] ***RV***: partner's who don't listen
[1:04] ***RV***: er, read
[1:04] ***SS***: Godmoding, which you touched on, and i'll cover in basic roleplay class, week after next
[1:05] Zealot Benmergui: Godmoding is another term for Powerposing...and yes, is very annoying
[1:05] Zealot Benmergui: ***RV***, partners that don;t listen in what way?
[1:05] ***SS***: Similar, but not exactly the same.
[1:05] ***MM*** listens to ***RV***
[1:06] Zealot Benmergui: Did she say anything yet?
[1:06] ***MM***: lol no
[1:06] ***RV***: well, if i type "sucks your cock deep into my throat" and they type "kisses you hard" or something ... it's clear they're fucking themselves
[1:06] Zealot Benmergui: wanted to be sure I didn;t miss it
[1:06] ***MM***: mmm cock
[1:06] ***RV***: instead of paying attention to what's going on in the scene
[1:07] Zealot Benmergui: or they are unclear where their mouth is
[1:07] ***RV***: lol
[1:07] ***MM***: lol
[1:07] ***MK***: Are you sure it's not chatlag?
[1:07] ***RV***: i'm sure
[1:07] ***AK***: Is that inpatients?
[1:07] Zealot Benmergui: actually, chatlag is often a problem...and another good reason for short poses
[1:07] ***RA***: paying attention to your partners need and being emotional invovled with the scene is good for both partners
[1:07] Zealot Benmergui: and posting them one and a time
[1:08] Zealot Benmergui: *nods to Miss ***RA***...Indeed, some people tend to think that doesn;t apply to D/s relationships, that all that matters is that the Dom likes the scene...
[1:08] Zealot Benmergui: since the sub just wants to please them
[1:08] Zealot Benmergui: however ideally is shouldbe a blend
[1:10] ***RA***: being a sub i agree with you
[1:11] Zealot Benmergui: considers....then just smiles
[1:11] ***RA***: it is a good idea sometimes to dicuss the scene with our dom and you both will get more out of it
[1:11] Zealot Benmergui: Yep, learn the difference next week
[1:12] Zealot Benmergui: I agree Miss ***RA***...how much discussion is often a matter of personal preference
[1:12] ***RA***: a good dom also wants to please his sub but there pleasures are quite different
[1:12] Zealot Benmergui: but it is always nice, especially when you don;t have a lot of experience with the partner, to more or less pencil in what sort of scene it will be...
[1:13] Zealot Benmergui: it can even be done subtly, by the subs asking to be taken hard, or teasing that she should be whipped for some indiscretion..have fun with it
[1:13] ***MM*** misses the lutefish
[1:13] ***RV***: the best is when your partner can pick up on the hints you leave *during* the scene
[1:14] ***AK*** agress with ***RV*** 100%
[1:14] Zealot Benmergui: I agree, but that is when you have experience with the partner...cues are tougher to catch without that
[1:14] ***RA***: there are lots of time the sub leads the scene
[1:14] ***RV***: i don't necessarily agree
[1:14] ***RV***: for instance:
[1:15] ***RV***: "writhes, spitted on your cock, wanting you to fuck her mercilessly"
[1:15] ***RV***: that's a pretty obvious cue
[1:15] Zealot Benmergui: Sure she wants to be spat on
[1:15] ***MM*** laughs
[1:15] ***RV***: throws an apple at Z's head
[1:15] Zealot Benmergui: owwwww
[1:15] ***RV***: ha! it was a nerf apple
[1:15] Zealot Benmergui wipes applesauce off his tie
[1:16] Zealot Benmergui: mmmm nerf
[1:16] ***PM***: question: if you're in a class trying to improve your cybering skills, why are you cybering with primarily people you don't know??? *shakes head*
[1:16] ***RV***: rofl
[1:16] Zealot Benmergui: Because they're fun
[1:17] ***PM***: seems to me the time here would be better spent at the Free Sex Empire.
[1:17] ***MM***: mmm free sex
[1:17] Zealot Benmergui: No time is better spent at the free sex empire
[1:17] ***SS***: Because if your cybering skills are for shit, you'll not be getting second helpings of virtual bearded clams from those you lust after
[1:17] ***PM***: (if that's all you care about)
[1:17] Zealot Benmergui: I'm not sure I am catching your point ***PM***
[1:18] ***SS***: ***PM***, improving your skills for being with random people increases the chance you'll attract one that wants your prim penis on a regular basis
[1:20] Zealot Benmergui: The nice ting about cybering skills is you can use them with a long time partner or someone you have just meant..skills are skills, and can often make up for a lack of experience or knowledge of that partner
[1:21] ***RV*** agrees
[1:21] ***SS***: Besides, free sex playgrounds are usually places for getting poseballers that think the sex animations are the end all be all and are illiterate twatwaffles, usually
[1:21] Zealot Benmergui: mmm twatwaffles
[1:21] ***RA***: as a ts escort i agree with you
[1:22] ***SS2*** snorts, atempting to stifle a giggle. "twatwaffles?"
[1:22] ***RA***: plus o many people in sl relay on use xcite and it takes away from cybering
[1:22] ***RV*** is an Xcite free zone
[1:23] Zealot Benmergui: OK, I think we will get some business out of the way, lest the dicsussion step too heavily on the courses ***SS*** is giving, as we have mentioned an awful lot during this lecture, gallant that I am
[1:23] ***MM*** sniffs ***RV*** for xcite parts
[1:23] ***SS***: Oh, I like my Xcite toys, though I hate the chat spam, so I turn that OFF, and use the animations with my own emotes
[1:23] Zealot Benmergui: Remember the next House of V lecture will by next Monday at 7 AM SL time, and the topic will be anniounced this weekend sometime, soon as I think of it
[1:24] ***SS*** bops Zealot on the head
[1:24] ***SS***: 5am, not 7
[1:24] ***MM***: blow jobs?
[1:24] ***RV***: mmm blow jobs
[1:24] Zealot Benmergui: also remember that in order to continue my dream of owning more prim genitals then anyone else in SL, this lecturer does accept tips paid directly to him, as I have no shame whatsoever
[1:24] Zealot Benmergui: 5Am?
[1:24] ***SS***: Aye
[1:25] ***SS***: I do believe Pirate has me scheduled for 5am Monday morn
[1:25] Zealot Benmergui: yeah sure whatever
[1:25] Zealot Benmergui: yeah sure whatever
[1:27] Zealot Benmergui: Also remember if you wish notification of MY lectures as opposed to any other lectures, all quite interesting I am sure but ones I have no control over regarding scheduling or whathave you, feel free to jointhe ZBANG group, or check my website at http://bardhaven.wordpress.com
[1:28] Zealot Benmergui: OK, that concludes business, so carry on cyber discussing as you see fit